kscans

(“Aah! I’ve already finished peeing!?”)

I don’t want to leave… I don’t want to come out of this toilet… Takahashi (♀) was approaching me, but I had to pause our conversation when my turn came and I needed to use the bathroom… I really don’t want to leave this toilet stall… but if I don’t come out, I’ll inconvenience the customers waiting behind me… there’s a line after all.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“No, I should be—ah… I mean, I’m the one who should apologize for interrupting when you needed the bathroom.”

When I trudged out of the toilet, Takahashi was waiting for me. And that way of speaking… I’d rather not bring it up, but…

“Feel free to talk naturally.”

“R-really? Then I will.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

Then silence. Say something, would you!?

“Let’s… find somewhere else to talk.”

“Sure.”

Prompted by Takahashi, I moved away from the bathroom. I was led to where Takahashi had left their belongings under a beach umbrella.

“Friends of yours?”

“Yeah, I came with some colleagues.”

“Colleagues… What are you doing now for work?”

“…I’m a childcare worker.”

Takahashi said this with slight embarrassment. Ch-childcare worker… a childcare worker, huh… I mean, it’s a respectable profession. Yes, I have absolutely nothing against the profession of childcare worker. Nothing at all. But still… Takahashi is…

“So, where’s your colleague?”

“…Hitting on guys. Childcare workers don’t get many chances to meet people.”

“I-I see.”

Then silence. Say something, would you!? (Count 2)

Takahashi fidgets, eyes wandering. If it’s this awkward, you could have just ignored me! Though I’d probably have called out too if I were in the same position!!

“…Anyway…”

“Y-yeah?”

“You’ve really let yourself go, haven’t you? You’re totally a middle-aged guy now.”

Takahashi pinches my stomach flab.

“Didn’t you used to look at tired salarymen walking around the station and say you’d never become a sad middle-aged guy like that, even when you turned forty or fifty?”

“Ugh…”

“You also said you’d stay cool even when you got older.”

My past self is stabbing my present self repeatedly… But that’s just how it is, right? That’s what high school boys are like.

“…And you’ve developed quite the sexy body yourself, huh?”

I instinctively fell back into our old banter, but—

“…I-is that so?”

Damn! This isn’t working!?

Our old rapport isn’t quite clicking! Is it the gender difference? Is that the issue?

I was expecting a comeback like “What are you, some perverted old man?” you know! Damn… I messed up. But don’t underestimate a salesman. My conversational skills are much better than this!!

“Not just your body, but your hair too. Takahashi-kun, didn’t you used to tell me? That guys shouldn’t be all flashy and stuff?”

Back then, I had bleached blonde hair and lots of piercings. Takahashi was also a rough character, but if you compared us, I probably looked more like a delinquent. Though in reality, I wasn’t constantly getting into fights like Takahashi. Looking at me, Takahashi would always complain that I was “too flashy,” “frivolous,” or ask “are you even a man?” But look at you now! Blonde hair and piercings all over!

“…Well, I’m a woman now.”

…That’s true.

And if you ask who made you that way, I have no defense.

“After I returned to the surface world, I couldn’t find the motivation to do anything for a while. I just wandered around aimlessly.”

“…I see.”

“But I figured I couldn’t go on like that forever. I thought I’d change my mindset by changing my image.”

“Starting with appearances, huh?”

“Yeah… but unlike you, Satou, I don’t know anything about fashion.”

“You and Suzuki both had that ‘clothes are just clothes’ mentality.”

So I used to pick out clothes for you and teach you how to have fun, didn’t I?

“Looking at fashion magazines didn’t help much, and I was wondering what to do… then, somehow, your face popped into my mind.”

“…So that’s why the blonde hair.”

Come to think of it, those piercings are also from the brand I liked in high school. I dyed my hair back and closed up the piercing holes when I started job hunting, so I didn’t notice right away.

“Looks good, right?”

“Yeah.”

Frustratingly so. Just going by appearances, it’s a direct hit to my groin. But is that okay for a childcare worker?

I guess you could take the piercings out when working if little kids pull on them, but the blonde hair… The director of your daycare must be pretty understanding.

“Anyway, we’ve talked enough about me. Tell me about yourself, Satou. What are you doing now?”

“Just a regular salaryman. I work at a company called ～～～, know it?”

“That’s a pretty good place. The kind of company my colleague would jump at if I told her.”

“I’m actually a section manager in the sales department.”

“A management position? Even better. But sales, huh… you always were good with words, Satou.”

Takahashi laughed, saying it suited me perfectly. The tension seemed to have drained away, and from there our conversation flowed smoothly, but then…

“Un~cle~?”

I turned around in shock to find Rika-chan glaring at me with puffed cheeks and hands on her hips.

“I came looking for you because you never came back… and here you are flirting and abandoning us? You’ve got some nerve!”

“Ah, no, this is—”

As I tried to explain,

“S-Saionji!? Y-you… you haven’t just dressed young, you’ve gotten younger…”

If we’re talking about dressing young, that applies to you too. Both Chika-san and Takahashi look like they’re in their late twenties. The color and texture of their skin doesn’t look like mid-thirties at all. I’m the only one aging normally here. And why would you immediately jump to the idea of getting younger…

“Huh? Who’s this?”

“Takahashi. This is Chika-san’s daughter.”

“Oh, a daughter… right, that makes sense. I mean, it would be nonsensical for Saionji to have gotten young enough to be a junior high student.”

Well, I could make her younger if I wanted.

“Um… Uncle?”

With her anger dissipated but clearly confused, Rika-chan turned to me… I can’t tell her about the gender change stuff. I’m sure Chika-san will cover for me if she asks about this later.

“An old friend of mine. Someone who also knows Chika-san. Their name is…”

What’s the name situation? Sensing my confusion, Takahashi jumped in with an introduction.

“I’m Takahashi Alice. Nice to meet you.”

Kept the last name and just changed the first name, I see.

“I’m Saionji Rika. Um, Takahashi-san, you know my mom too?”

“Sure do. Haven’t seen her in nearly twenty years though.”

“I hadn’t seen Takahashi either, but we ran into each other by chance just now. We got caught up in conversation.”

“Oh, I see… sorry, Uncle, for interrupting. I’ll make up something to tell the others, so take your time!!”

What a good kid…

“Please excuse me!”

“Sure.”

When Rika-chan was out of sight, Takahashi tilted her head curiously.

“She called you ‘Uncle’ and stuff.”

“? Yeah.”

“You didn’t end up with Saionji?”

“————”

“No way, seriously? That’s definitely where things were heading.”

You… you…!!

“WHYYYYYYYYYYYY DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAAAAAAAAT!!”

I wept.