Chapter 558 - On a Certain Archiver's Stream: Part 1
"—This is Terutsuki. A nuke just dropped, so this is a pop-up stream. I'm gonna break it down, so you all better be ready."
You set up the stream so fast, lmao.
I absooooooolutely knew this was coming.
It's scary how the stream started the instant the video was uploaded, but nice work.
Heyo.
There he is, the completely-fallen Acrobat fan.
Congrats on 20k subs.
Lmao, you're basically a stalker Archiver now.
A victory announcement followed by a rank update... yeah, we knew a bombshell was coming.
There are two videos! Two! Obviously we're watching both, right!?
"Of course we are! It's our duty—so let's get right to it! Can't wait for more people to show up! LET'S WATCH THE FIRST ONE, GO!"
Thump, clank, CRASH.
Hey, did anyone else just hear something shatter?
Don't go wild, lol.
Calm down, you hardcore fanboy.
This is just a rabid fan at this point.
"Sorry, my mouse went flying and broke something. Whatever, let's watch."
It's not "whatever," lmao.
How in the world did your mouse go flying?
Did you throw it???
You should take care of your things, man.
Oh.
Oh.
It's starting.
Hype.
Ah... a very, very familiar sight.
Well, given the direction and distance, it was pretty much a sure thing.
The Shadow-Infested Arena!
On the topic of still not having a consensus on how to pronounce '影滲'… (t/n: kage shin, shadow blur)
Isn't it 'Eishin'?
The truth will remain in darkness until we get an official reading...
First video is a solo run, huh.
Y-yeah. The first one is.
The title of the second video... it basically confirms it, doesn't it?
"I'm looking forward to that one too, but let's focus on this first. The form of this crucial rep is... ah."
Mmm, it's humanoid.
Yep, confirmed to be insane.
Humanoid replicants are the one thing you don't mess with.
Like that nine-tailed lady.
Looks strong.
"Fwha—"
Ah.
Whoa.
Huh?
YEP.
Ehh...
Insta-killed, not even funny.
The fact that the first move is immediately replayed in super slow-mo is the only thing to laugh at here.
And even then, you can barely follow it with your eyes.
What was that just now? Isn't its reaction speed broken?
The Acrobat charging head-on from the get-go is pretty crazy too.
You really have too little aversion to the Game Over screen, my friend.
A picture-perfect cross counter... Is it a melee type?
This has to be a nine-tailed fox spirit. I'd expect it to use magic, though.
Oh.
Dead again.
"Ssssuuuu—... Huh? Isn't this thing insane? It just flat-out beat Haru-san in a pure speed contest. And it looked like he even used [Rocket]."
How can you tell he used a skill like it's the most obvious thing in the world?
That's the obsessive observation skill of a true fanboy.
[Rocket] is pretty easy to spot since you can see the water splash at his feet.
The deaths just won't stop.
Tenth time.
Oh, [Desperate Crimson].
There it is, the cheap, insane power-up form...!
And the slow-mo multiplier goes even higher!
Oh, my.
YEP.
Yep.
"No, no, no... no, no, no, no..."
—Seriously, a no-charge destruction beam is just not fair.
He's saying something.
You know, most of the stuff you do is also "not fair," right?
Lmao, such an honest complaint.
So it is a magic type after all?
A magic type shouldn't be able to hold its own in a close-quarters fight with one of the fastest fighters out there.
Well, casually firing off a massive beam is definitely a guilty pleasure.
The speed at which it draws the magic circle is insane. It wasn't even a second, it was an instant.
Twentieth time.
His death count is getting ridiculous in just a few minutes.
I would've been broken after the second try.
How can he die so casually and still look so unfazed...?
"His mentality is incredible, as expected, but... I guess this first video is just that kind of thing(............), huh."
A video of him losing, most likely?
So that's why there are two parts.
Ah, so this is just reconnaissance. Got it.
He's going full throttle for a recon mission, though.
It's very Haru-like to enjoy everything at full power. Love to see it.
—Haaaaaaah! What the hell is this?! That's cheating, you bastard!
Enjoying it, is he...?
Enjoying death, more like.
Well, I mean...
If a bullet hell suddenly started, yeah, you'd scream too.
What is this?
So it has tricky moves besides the beam, I see.
"He's getting slowed down every time he gets hit... Is it a debuff that puts a strain on AGI?"
Looks like it.
Yeah, that's what it seems like.
A counter for a tuna that's always on the move, huh.
A migratory fish caught in a set net, maybe?
"Pfft."
Lmao.
Lmao lmao.
A set net & migratory fish is hilarious.
—Wait a sec, hey, this is impossible...!
Seems like it's no laughing matter for the man himself, though.
Of course not.
Countless—no, infinite—untouchable obstacles scattered everywhere & it can match his crucial agility & it can spam a wide-area, giant laser with no charge time...?
Impossible, right???
What is this? It's basically a raid boss at this point.
It's been a while since I've seen a boss this refreshingly impossible.
It feels like the General Commander's super-alloy robot that was never meant to be beaten.
Or Mi-na and Ri-na's magic dragon.
The Sword Saint's grandpa...
Thirtieth time.
This might be on the same level as Iris-sama's armored knight.
Yeah, could be...
Wait. I know how this ends, which is why this makes no sense.
This thing? Seriously???
I'm starting to feel my body temperature rise.
It's so much crazier than I imagined, my hype for the second video is off the charts.
"Ah, hold on, I can't. My hands have gone past trembling and are starting to spasm."
I can hear the intense rattling, lol.
Maybe let go of the mouse and calm down for a sec... lol.
Fortieth time.
So basically, he's establishing this sense of hopeless, impossible difficulty, and then...
He's going to team up with the Princess to show us him beating this thing after it becomes even more of a monster.
Ah, the ol' opening act before the main event pattern.
The possibility that he didn't actually clear it has emerged. The victory announcement and rank update were just some kind of mistake (????).
This guy never brings anything but confusion to his viewers.
Whoa, he's smiling... creepy...
That smile is what makes him great, ya know.
"This smile is what makes him great."
This is why I love him.
This is what the Acrobat is all about.
That oozing confidence is just so good.
No wonder the Princess fell for him.
If he looked at me like that, I'm confident I'd fall for him too.
Fif... Fif-t... fifty...
Damn, he's holding on for so long.
Why is it so intense watching him just run for his life?
Agility builds just have that flashiness to them.
"Ah, he's so cool, I love him. I'll follow this guy for the rest of my life."
Yes, yes, Acrobat fanboy, Acrobat fanboy.
He is genuinely cool, though...
I don't know if it's a habit or what, but I love how he sometimes does these flashy, meaningless spins when he changes direction. It feels like a performance.
I kinda get that.
"That's probably—no, definitely—a move to instantly decide his next action. During those moments he reverses direction in the middle of super high-speed movement, he does a full 360 check to grasp the situation. If you slow it down to the absolute max and zoom in on his eyes, you can see his gaze shifting like crazy. I'm pretty sure I'm right."
Huh, neat.
So there was a secret behind those pointlessly refined, pointless movements that had no wasted motion.
He's really studied him...
Lmao, he's such a purebred otaku.
That explanation was so fast it needed its own slow-mo replay.
Ah.
Aww...
Well, that's that...
Fifty.
Guess he couldn't get away after all.
Nah, but he lasted like thirty seconds, right? That's just inhuman.
"For real. As expected of him...—"
—This is impossible. Retreat.
"Oh, for real?"
So the first video ends here, aaaah.
50 deaths in what was probably a ten-minute battle is just a bug in the system.
It was a death compilation, wasn't it...
If this was the only video, someone—not naming names—would have been mercilessly mocked.
Yeah, if this was the only one.
It would've been bait for the haters. If this was the only one, that is.
The second video...! Hurry up with the second video...!!
"Alright, shall we...? I'll say it again: are you all ready for this?"
Oh, we're fired up.
I'm ready for the symphony of screams.
It has arrived, the time for common sense to be shattered.
And also the time for our brains to be broken by their presumed date with the Princess.
Hey, stop that.
I'm starting to feel sick.
In many ways, the video of a guaranteed victory is about to begin.
Don't care. Press (the play button).
"Okay, pressing it—so here we go, the second one, GO!"
Thump, clank, CRASH.
Oi, lol.
Again?
Calm down, Terutsuki!
You really... lol.
What did you break this time...!?
Mouse: "I don't get it."
Just ignore Teru-kun's weird antics. We don't have time for that.
HERE IT COMES, THE SUPER HIGH-QUALITY OPENING.
Brought to you by the Shijo Group!!!
This is the real deal, in name and in fact...
Took some extra motion sickness pills. Bring it on.
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Looks like fun.