Chapter 140 - <13>
Ritz sat perched on the branch of a large tree, leaning against the trunk and gazing up at the sky. It had been early afternoon and bright when he’d arrived, but now the moon had already climbed high, and it was nearly midnight.
Almost twelve hours, half a day, had passed, and yet he still couldn't sort out his feelings. He had thought he could make a clean break, that he could completely forget the happy times he'd had, but for some reason, it wasn't working out this time, and it was frustrating.
What's so charming about that naive, reckless, absent-minded Anna, who always worries about others before herself? he asked himself over and over. But each time, he would remember Anna's smile, her mature and gentle expression, and the warmth of her soft, small hand, which for some reason he could never resist.
Remembering it made him desperately long for Anna's warmth.
"Tch…"
He clicked his tongue, took a piece of dried meat from his pocket, tore off a small piece, and tossed it into his mouth. With no alcohol or tobacco here, dried meat was sadly the only thing to appease his oral fixation. Still, he admired his own foresight in bringing even that much.
It's okay. I still have enough composure to bring dried meat.
He glanced at his own hand. Anna's face twisted in fear, and she pushed this hand away, he reminded himself of the fact. See, I told you so. Anna and I live in different worlds. We can't walk together. You knew she would run away if she found out what you've done, didn't you?
He knew, he was prepared for it, so why did it hurt so much? This hand, which had only been pushed away by a powerless Anna. He hadn't expected it to be this painful.
But in a way, you could say the wound was shallow. If he had realized it later, it would have hurt even more. And it would have been even harder to sever his feelings for Anna.
This is for the best. This is fine.
He would return to his original role with Anna, that of a guardian who watches over her, amused by the outrageous things she does. At first, Anna would probably still be afraid of him. But if he kept a proper distance, they would eventually go back to being companions.
If she seemed too scared, he could even joke around and tell his past experiences in an amusing way. There was no longer any need to keep quiet for fear of being disliked. In fact, doing that might even make things less awkward for Anna.
He no longer needed her to think of him as the most important person after her foster father. When the journey was over, it would be enough to wave and say, "Well, take care." And from there, they would become complete strangers.
A sigh escaped him.
"I’m really such a pathetic guy…"
He muttered, but there was no one to hear his words. He was in a place high enough to look down on the Ciedena Forest below.
Beneath this forest were the Clan of Light, his family, his companions, and the woman he loved. Looking down from above the forest, he couldn't recognize a single person.
He was here, all alone.
He wondered what it would be like if there was no one else in this world, just him.
If it were just him, he wouldn't be born a tainted child of sin. It would just be him. If he had no family, he wouldn't know the warmth of a family. If he had no companions, he wouldn't need to desire their trust. And if he had no one to love… he would have nothing to lose.
What inconvenient creatures people were. If you were alone from birth until death, if you didn't know there were other people, you wouldn't think of wanting to be by someone's side, of wanting to live with someone.
And yet he… he yearned for connections, for human warmth, for smiles, for trust, for a place to live, and he struggled and suffered because he couldn't obtain them.
Not of the Clan of Light, not human, with no one else of his kind—if there was a meaning to his birth, he wished the Goddess, or the Spirit King, or anyone would tell him.
Why was he brought into this world?
"Anna…"
For a moment, he had seriously thought they could live together. Even though thinking about it was pointless.
"Aaaargh! I'm so pathetic!"
His thoughts had circled back again. Frustrated, he ran his hands through his hair. He planned to show his face by breakfast. The time limit was only half of what he'd spent worrying so far.
He let out a deep sigh, wondering what to do.
It was then.
"Ritz, found you!"
At the cheerful, loud voice, his heart froze.
"I was looking for you. I was looking all over."
He looked down below the tree, and there was Anna. Her hair was loose and messy, but she was smiling brightly as always. As if nothing had happened.
He instinctively looked at his own hand. This was the tainted hand that Anna had pushed away. Don't take Anna's hand anymore, he told himself. Taking a breath so Anna wouldn't see, he yelled down at the base of the tree.
"I told you I’d be back tomorrow, didn't I? Didn't you hear it from Ed?"
"I did."
"Then go home."
He said it coldly and immediately looked forward again. Anna would remember the fear she had felt physically earlier that day, so he thought she would leave, but Anna didn't give up.
"Hey, hey, can I climb up there?"
"No."
"But it looks like a really great view. I want to see it too."
"I said no. Go home."
"Um, I guess I put my foot here."
"Do you have ears? I said go home."
He let out a cold, mocking laugh as he pushed her away, and for a moment Anna looked down, frightened. Then she composed herself again, looked up, and glared at Ritz in the tree.
"No."
"…What?"
"Absolutely not!"
Almost shouting, she began to desperately climb the tree. He had thought she wouldn't be able to climb this far, but his assumption was completely wrong. Come to think of it, Anna's orphanage had an orchard, he finally remembered.
While he was wondering how to get rid of her, Anna had reached the branch next to his. And she stood unsteadily on it. It was a thick branch, so it didn't budge, but her movements were still extremely dangerous.
"Wow… what an amazing view."
Looking down at the Ciedena Forest bathed in moonlight, Anna let out a cry of delight.
"I see why you'd want to keep this a secret, Ritz. It's incredible."
"I told you not to come."
He said it as if spitting out the words with annoyance, then leaned back against the tree trunk, put on a grumpy expression, and closed his eyes. Unfazed by Ritz, Anna continued to look at the Ciedena Forest.
"There are so many people under this forest, aren't there? The Spirit Tribe, Franz, Ed-san, your father and mother."
He was surprised. She was thinking the same thing as him. But what came next was completely different.
"You can't see them from here, but thinking they're all there makes me feel so warm."
"…You think so?"
"Yeah. So it's not lonely."
"Hmm."
So that's how she thinks, Anna. He was strangely impressed. He tended to view things in a dark way. Anna viewed them in a bright way. Light and darkness are two sides of the same coin, and darkness seeks the light, so it was only natural that he was drawn to Anna, he now realized.
"You've seen the view now, right? Go home."
"…No."
"Go home. I don't want to talk to you right now."
He said it coldly, then fixed his gaze on Anna. He could see Anna stiffen for a moment. She wasn't afraid of the height. She was afraid of Ritz. If you're scared, don't come looking for me, he muttered in his heart. Every time she looked at him with frightened eyes, the wound he was trying to bury deep in his heart reopened.
But Anna didn't back down an inch. She just kept staring at Ritz.
In the end, it was Ritz who looked away first.
"Please, Anna. Leave me alone."
His words had turned into a plea. But his tone remained cold. This would make Anna back down. He thought so. But the next moment, his eyes widened. Anna was slowly walking along the branch towards the tip.
"What are you doing?"
She didn't look back at his question, just kept walking.
"Stop it."
The tip of a branch can suddenly become thin. It was dangerous.
"Stop it, Anna!"
"No."
"Anna!"
"Not unless you look at me properly. No."
"W-What?"
Anna stopped in her tracks. She slowly turned to face Ritz. Her eyes were terrifyingly serious. He had almost never seen Anna like this. The last time he saw her… yes, it was that time. When Ritz had failed to die and was feeling down…
"If you promise, I'll come down, but if you don't promise, I'll walk even further, okay?"
"Are you… trying to threaten me?"
"No. I just want to talk to you, Ritz."
"That's what they call a threat. Remember that!"
"Then, let's get down from the tree and talk, okay?"
"Listen here…"
For some reason, she was much less reasonable than the usual Anna. Or rather, she wasn't listening at all. Faced with an Anna who was completely different from usual, Ritz was at a loss.
"Anna."
"What is it?"
"You heard from Ed, right? That I’m going to stop depending on you."
"Yeah. I heard."
"I need time to sort out my feelings. Can't you understand? You don't want a man like me depending on you, do you?"
His bitter, true feelings slipped out. The next moment they turned into bitter regret, but Anna didn't seem to notice, just tilted her head and thought for a moment.
"…What kind of man?"
"Twisted, dishonest, gloomy, with a past full of things I want to hide. And on top of that, a murderer you despise."
"Yeah. And on top of that, you don't have a specific lover, you just go through women one after another, right?"
"…Who told you that?"
"Jin-san."
"That bastard…"
He slightly regretted not killing him, but what Jin said wasn't wrong. Ritz did have such a past.
"That's right. And on top of that, I'm a hopeless man with no place to live but to wander."
His own evaluation of himself became ridiculous, and Ritz sneered. He was undoubtedly the worst kind of man. If he were a woman, he would definitely reject him.
"I've already made up my mind. Let's just pretend it never happened."
He said, looking at Anna again.
"Our conversation is over. Go home."
"You really won't talk to me?"
"Yeah. We've talked. It's over."
"I see."
Anna swung her arms wildly on the branch. The gesture was so far beyond dangerous it was comical, and he couldn't help but ask.
"What are you doing?"
"Ritz, you like to gamble, right?"
"Huh?"
"If I can jump down safely, let's talk down there. If I can't, I'll give up too."
"Hey, you'd normally die from that."
"That's why it's a gamble."
"Stop it."
"If I die, it's not your fault, Ritz. It's mine."
"What kind of stupid bet is that?!"
"It's not your fault, Ritz. It's all my fault. Don't worry about it."
As she repeated those words with a serious gaze, he involuntarily held his breath. These words, Ritz had said them to Anna. In other words, Anna was angry that Ritz had told her that.
"I get it. I'll come down. We'll get down and talk."
So this is how it ends up, Ritz slumped his shoulders in defeat. From the start, Ritz had no cards to play against Anna.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Let's get down."
With a sigh, Ritz climbed down the tree. Anna, though clumsy, also came down without incident.
This giant tree stood on the opposite shore of the lake from Ritz's house, in a surprisingly open area. Even with a slightly waning moon, the light from the nearly full moon was plenty bright.
He sat down at the base of the tree with a sigh, and Anna sat down about a meter away.
"What did you want to talk about?"
He asked immediately, and Anna looked straight at him.
"I wanted to apologize."
He thought it would be about her pushing his hand away, but it wasn't.
"I'm sorry for trying to dig into your past without your permission. I won't do it again."
"…Yeah."
"I was wrong. I really regret it. So… from now on, I'll wait until you're ready to tell me."
"Listen, that's why you and I, this, um, what do you call it…"
"What?"
"Anyway, I'm going to stop, so…"
It was a lame way to put it. But he couldn't think of any other way to say it. It wasn't like they were lovers or had an intimate relationship.
"Yeah. I know you dislike me now, so I guess that can't be helped."
"Huh?"
It was a completely unexpected thing for her to say.
"I did something like digging up things you wanted to keep hidden. I'm prepared for that, but…"
"What?"
"But, I'll do my best to earn your trust again, so, um… is it okay if I stay with you?"
It was such an unexpected offer that Ritz was the one who furrowed his brow. Given the situation and her attitude before, he couldn't understand Anna's proposal at all.
"You… you're scared of me, aren't you?"
"I was scared then. I was really scared."
"Right? That's just how I am. So keep your distance."
"But, I think that was my punishment for doing something bad."
"Huh?"
"I think that if I hadn't done something like this and had stayed with Ritz, he would have told me about his past when I came to understand him properly."
If we had stayed together? So she had intended to? This was the first he'd heard of it.
"But I forced it, didn't I? I pried open Ritz's past. So, the scary experience was my punishment for that."
Anna said this with her head slightly bowed, then looked up and stared straight at him.
"I'm not scared anymore. Really, I'm really not."
Her eyes were so unwavering that Ritz no longer knew what he wanted to say. Confused, he looked at Anna and noticed that her legs, extending from her skirt, were covered in scratches.
"You're hurt."
"Yeah. It's dark in the forest. I should have brought Sara-chan."
Anna said it nonchalantly. But he understood that she had been wandering through the dark forest without a light, looking for him.
"…Since when?"
"What?"
"Since when have you been looking for me?"
"…Since this evening. You weren't anywhere, so I was really worried. But then, by chance, when I passed under the tree, you were muttering something, right? That's how I found you."
Anna said this with a shy smile.
"Hey Ritz, Ed-san told me that there are people in the world who need another person's entire life to be saved. And that you're one of them."
Anna said with a smile.
"So, he told me that if I couldn't give my whole life to Ritz, I shouldn't get deeply involved with him anymore."
What a ridiculous thing to say. But it would probably make Anna give up. If Ritz were in Edward's position, he would say the same thing. A person's life isn't something you can just give away. But Anna was different.
"But I didn't want that. I didn't want to lose Ritz's kindness, and I didn't want him to stop relying on me."
Anna had a somehow resolute expression on her face. He thought she must have decided something, but he wasn't sure what it was.
"Because, things like giving your whole life, or dedicating your entire life, I don't understand that yet. The future is vague, and so far away you can't see what's ahead, right? If you're scared of that now, you can't do anything. Because nothing is decided about my and Ritz's future, right?"
"That's true."
"See? Maybe Ritz will find a place to belong, or a lover."
That will never happen… he wouldn't say it out loud, but he thought it. Instead, Ritz looked at Anna.
"You might find a lover, or a place to belong."
"Hmm. I wonder if that would be difficult?"
"It wouldn't be difficult at all."
You're the best woman there is.
"When that happens, what will you do if I become obsessed with you? We'll end up hating each other, you know?"
"We won't."
"Yes, we will. That's why I… I want to start over with a clean slate here. I won't rely on you again."
He said this stubbornly, staring at Anna. I want you to understand. Don't make me say any more than this, he thought. But Anna thought for a moment, then looked up again.
"In that case, let's promise from the start that we'll give up cleanly!"
He was speechless at that shift in her thinking. He stared at Anna for a while.
"On top of that, as long as we don't get in each other's way, can't we stay together?"
"Well, that's… a pretty convenient arrangement. For both of us."
He said it with a bit of amusement, and Anna smiled brightly.
"Because right now, the person I want to live with is you, Ritz."
Her confident, clear smile, without a trace of hesitation, left him speechless. But Anna continued to speak, looking straight at the bewildered Ritz.
"Living together means trying to understand the other person even after knowing everything about them. To understand, you have to talk."
"Anna, you…"
"So let's talk a lot more. Let's stop keeping secrets as much as possible, and just talk a lot."
"But…"
"Okay? Talk to me."
Anna's calm words had a gentle echo that seemed to embrace even the past. But, feeling that, Ritz still hesitated.
What he didn't want Anna to know, she already knew. There was no need to fear that point. But he was incredibly cowardly, and hopelessly dishonest. Even now, he was afraid of losing her, so he kept his feelings for Anna hidden, unable to confess.
Ritz always chose to run away, wanting not to lose the trust and warm place he had grasped in his hands.
Edward, Patricia, Shasta. He had run away from them, his important companions. He was afraid of the passage of time, afraid he couldn't bear the loss, so he had abandoned them all and fled.
As more time passed, when he heard through the grapevine that they had all met their end, he would surely feel an immense sense of loss. But compared to watching them grow old and die before his eyes, running far away meant their deaths wouldn't feel so real to him.
Yes. He could pretend they were living happily, just like in a story.
He was by no means a mentally strong man. In fact, he was so fragile it was ridiculous even to himself. And yet his body continued to possess the skill to easily kill people.
Mind and body. These two were surprisingly unbalanced in Ritz.
Is that okay?
Would Anna still forgive such an unstable Ritz?
"Are you sure you want to promise something like that? I'm… a murderer, you know?"
"It's fine. If you're going to say that, then so am I."
He was reminded that Anna had killed the four monsterized men, including Marquis Walter.
"But from now on, let's think about what other options there are first. I'm with you, so between the two of us, we'll definitely think of something."
With that, Anna slowly moved closer to Ritz.
"So Ritz, you have to stop keeping your distance from me."
With a mature tone, Anna said this with a soft, admonishing smile. Anna was close enough to touch if he reached out his hand.
If he reached out to Anna now, he wouldn't be able to let go.
If he sent her away without touching her, he could still live alone.
This was the final choice.
Though hesitant and confused, his hand naturally reached for Anna. He gently touched her soft-looking cheek. Anna flinched for a moment, then smiled gently.
"I'm fine. I promised you, Ritz. That I wouldn't get hurt."
"Anna."
He realized his own hand touching Anna's cheek was trembling pathetically. Love, and the fear of losing her, swirled in his confused mind.
Would Anna once again take this hand…
This hand that, as a tainted child of sin from birth, was never even acknowledged.
This hand of a hopeless man, stained with human blood and utterly defiled.
This hand of a cowardly man who only ever ran from the feelings of his companions.
Would she take it as gently as she always had?
What should he do? How could he keep from losing Anna?
He didn't know anything anymore.
A soft sensation was laid over his trembling palm. Anna, noticing Ritz's confusion, had placed her hand on his.
Her gentle hand was warm.
"See? It's okay, isn't it?"
The moment she smiled, he had pulled Anna into his arms. He held her slender body tightly, and after a moment of stiffening, Anna slowly wrapped her arms around his back.
With that, his resolve to treat Anna as a stranger was shattered into a thousand pieces. He didn't think he could ever let Anna go again.
He vaguely remembered Edward telling him not to say something so half-hearted as a limited time if he was going to get involved with Anna.
He realized now that he didn't need to set a time limit.
As Anna said, as long as they needed each other, if they could support each other like this, they might find their answer in the future.
For now, this relationship of more than companions, less than lovers, where they could give each other warmth, was enough. Since it was easy to see she didn't think of him as a man at all, that was fine.
In the near or distant future, he didn't know, but Anna might really get a lover. If that happened, he would just have to let go of her arm. He was pretty sure he'd be incredibly jealous of the other guy, but he'd put on a big brotherly face and congratulate her.
Even a future like that was still easier to bear than losing her from his arms completely.
And if she was left alone again after her human lover passed away, he would take her hand again. Until she found something new.
That kind of future was also a possibility.
It was a mistake to be so consumed by anxiety about the future and push her away.
He was finally able to think that way.
How long had they been embracing like that? He had started to calm down a little. He slightly lifted his face to look at Anna and noticed the scar Jin had left on her cheek with his knife. It seemed she hadn't healed it.
Out of love, and anger and jealousy toward Jin for touching her there, he unconsciously ran his tongue over the scar, licking it slowly and lovingly. Anna, who hadn't realized what was happening, let out a cry of protest when she finally felt the sensation.
"No!"
"Ah, sorry."
He reflexively apologized and pulled away. Anna, surprised, touched her own wound.
"What did you do?"
She probably knew he had touched it with his tongue. He worried that he might have reminded her of something unpleasant, but Anna didn't seem to understand the meaning of what he had done and just looked puzzled.
"Um, disinfecting it, I guess?"
It was a lame excuse.
"Disinfecting?"
"Yeah. It's not nice, having a guy like that be the last to touch you. So, um… let me touch you instead."
Though he was serious, he asked in a joking manner, and Anna thought for a moment before nodding.
"Come to think of it, licking a wound is supposed to be good for it, isn't it? My foster father used to say that a lot."
"Yeah, that's right."
"Okay then, you can. Here."
With that, Anna smiled and offered the scar on her cheek. He was amazed at her lack of caution.
"…Don't you ever let any other man do this, you hear?"
He said this honestly while gently cupping her chin, and Anna laughed cheerfully.
"I won't. It's only okay if it's my foster father or Ritz."
She really doesn't see me as a man at all, he thought with some dissatisfaction, but then decided it was convenient and gently pressed his lips to the wound. Anna, squirming at the ticklish sensation, was unbearably cute.
Then he slowly cupped both of Anna's cheeks in his hands and gently kissed her forehead.
After a moment, he pulled away, and Anna looked up at him with a puzzled expression.
"There's no wound there, you know?"
"I know that."
"Then why?"
"…It's my feelings."
With that, he finally released Anna from his arms. Anna was stroking her forehead with a puzzled look on her face.
"Thank you, Anna. For forgiving me."
The words came from his heart.
Thank you for acknowledging my existence.
Thank you for accepting my past.
Thank you for allowing me to be with you.
I love you, my Anna.
The words felt too light to say out loud, so he couldn't. But he put all his feelings into that kiss on her forehead.
Anna smiled happily and warmly. It seemed his feelings of gratitude had gotten through to her.
"You know, Ritz."
"Hmm?"
"You said you were looking for a place to belong, right?"
"Yeah, well."
He hesitated, not knowing how to answer, and Anna looked up at Ritz with a brilliant smile.
"You know, I think it's probably no good if you limit it to just this one place. So, how about thinking of it this way? The whole world is your place to belong. Ciedena, Vishnu, Sears, all of it. Ed-san is here, Franz is here, the Queen is here, Uncle Karl and Aunt Ciela are here, and then you and I are here too. This whole world is Ritz's place."
"…That's a grand thought."
"Yeah. But if you think of it that way, you won't be lonely at all."
It was a positive way of thinking, just like Anna. It was a conclusion that Ritz, who always sought tangible proof in life, could never reach.
That's why Anna was a guiding light for Ritz.
"It's okay even if everyone dies and it's just us."
With that, Anna stood up and opened her arms wide.
"Because the world is right here."
When Anna said it, it was strange how he could believe it might really be true. Was this what they called love being blind? Or did Anna have the power to make him think that way?
One thing he knew for sure was that Anna herself believed it.
That's why he could complain without worry.
"You say that so carefree like it's someone else's problem. You're definitely going to die first, you know? Even if you're a half-breed of the longest-lived Spirit Tribe and a human, your lifespan is at most around five hundred years. If you inherit more human blood, it could be two hundred years. I'm the one who'll be left behind."
The facts he had been too afraid to voice before now came out smoothly. He had nothing left to hide from Anna except his own feelings. He was surprised by that himself.
"If you inherit more of the Spirit Tribe's blood, you might live for seven hundred years, you know?"
"Ugh… well…"
"In that case, when I'm seven hundred, Ritz will be eight hundred and twenty. I don't think that's too bad."
"Well… maybe."
Will you be with me all that time?
He wanted to ask, but he stopped himself. He thought it might be too much to tie Anna down like that. Instead, Ritz pointed up at the tree.
"Want to climb up?"
"Huh?"
"Want to watch the sunrise together? The view from up here is the best, you know."
"But… there's quite a bit of time, isn't there? Do you think I'll fall?"
"It's fine. I'll hold you so you don't fall."
He said with a smile, and Anna smiled back with a brilliant one of her own.
"Yeah!"
Soon, the night would end.
Ritz's long darkness had finally met its dawn.
Because he was holding me, it felt so good that I easily fell asleep in Ritz's arms before the sun came up. I guess I was tired from wandering around in the forest so much.
He woke me up and we watched the sunrise together before heading back to his house, but I was so drowsy in bed that I ended up being a little late for breakfast preparations. After changing, I said a quick prayer and rushed into the kitchen.
"Good morning."
"Oh, good morning."
As I bowed my head, I saw a girl-shaped figure of water toddling past me.
"…An Undine?"
"That's right. I thought you might not be able to wake up today since you and my son came home together at dawn, so I'm having her help me instead."
"Is that so? How cute."
When I looked, another Undine was washing vegetables. Or rather, she was swimming in the bowl of vegetables. It looked like a lot of fun. I had heard that Ciela was a master spirit user, but this was the first time I had seen her having them help with housework so normally.
"Oh dear, the bread will burn."
Ciela bustled over and opened the stone oven. I casually glanced inside the brightly burning interior and noticed something was there. Looking closely, I saw the shadow of what looked like a Salamander. And there were several of them…
"Huh?"
When I spoke up, the something turned to look at me.
"Anki~?"
"Sara-chan?"
I was wondering where she was, and it turns out she was here all along. I had no idea.
"When did you…"
"Oh, you noticed? She has friends in here, so she's taken a liking to it. She's been in here the whole time."
So that meant there was always a Salamander in this oven. A lot has happened, so I didn't notice, but now that I think about it, this is an amazing house. Almost all the fire in the house is from Salamanders, the water work is done by Undines, and the patrols are done by Sylphs. It seems Ciela is handling all of this at once.
As expected of a master spirit user. Anna, who could only handle water spirits, and even then not very well, earnestly wished she would teach her a few tricks. Come to think of it, Karl could also use wood spirits, apparently. Unthinkable in the outside world.
As Anna was marveling, Ciela lowered her voice and whispered in her ear.
"By the way, Anna, did my son do anything strange to you?"
"Huh?"
"Like, pin you down, or, you know, force himself on you…"
"Excuse me? What is that?"
"Were you okay? Then I'm glad. That part of him, he gets from his father. Karl, you know, he's quite fast with his hands."
"Auntie."
"What is it?"
"What is a 'strange thing'?"
"Huh?"
"Yesterday, when Jin-san grabbed me, he pushed me down and said something about 'laying hands on me' and 'the captain must be fond of you.' What does that mean?"
"Oh?"
Ciela's eyes widened in genuine surprise.
"Um… Anna. Do you know where babies come from?"
"Yes. When a married couple gets along well, the Goddess puts a baby in the mother's belly."
"Well, yes, but."
"Does that have anything to do with that 'strange thing'?"
"Hmm, it sort of does and sort of doesn't…"
I don't know what it is, but she seems flustered. Did I ask something strange?
"What are you doing? It's getting pretty late, Mom."
Ritz popped his head in.
"Oh, Ritz."
Flustered, Ciela turned to face a random direction and put a hand to her mouth. Ritz gave her a questioning look, and Anna greeted him cheerfully.
"Good morning, Ritz."
"Morning."
"Ritz, I'm surprised you're up. You haven't slept for two nights, right? I was sure you wouldn't get up."
"I had something to do. Oh, right, before I forget…"
Ritz smiled gently, pulled Anna's head closer, and gave her hair a light, bouncy kiss.
"Eh, eh?"
"A thank you for this morning. If you don't mind, please accept it."
"For what?"
"Well, for various things."
With that, Ritz gave a little wink, and his face had a completely different impression than before. Like a composed adult, but also very close to Anna. That's how it felt.
"Yeah. I don't mind."
"That's good. Anything I can help with?"
"Not at the moment, I think."
"Then I guess I'll go for a walk."
As Ritz said that, Ciela called out to him.
"Ritz."
"What is it, Mom?"
"Good luck. Your mom is cheering for you."
"…Huh? What's that about?"
As he said that, Ritz turned his back and started to leave. It was then that Anna noticed something different about his back. Something that had naturally been there until now was gone.
"Ritz, your hair!"
The single long lock of glossy black hair he had grown out was gone.
"Oh, yeah."
"What happened? Did something happen?"
Surprised, she reached for the back of Ritz's head. A few strands of hair had fallen there, and it was obvious it had just been cut.
"Looks refreshing, doesn't it?"
"Yeah. But… why?"
"Why, you ask? Well, that's…"
With that, Ritz looked back at Anna with clear, unwavering eyes.
"Because this whole world is my place to belong, I guess. And besides, I have you."
With a refreshed face, as if something had been lifted, Ritz smiled.
"Right, Anna?"
For some reason she couldn't explain, a happiness that made her chest tighten filled Anna's heart. This smile of Ritz's, she thought, was the most wonderful smile she had ever seen.
"Ritz."
"Hmm?"
"I love you, you know."
"Yeah. Thanks."
Smiling gently, Ritz left the kitchen.
"Anna, please take care of him."
When she came to, Ciela was smiling with the face of a mother, a complete change from before.
"Please take care of my boy."
"I will."
Anna quietly tucked away the strange, bubbling happiness deep in her heart.