Chapter 98 - 5
"Dammit, they really hit me hard..."
Ritz muttered to himself, holding his aching cheek.
In the dim light, only his shadow, illuminated by a lamp, flickered on the wall of the ship's hold. The spot where he'd been hit seemed to be a little swollen.
Since he was pretending to be an amateur, he couldn't completely dodge it, but he had managed to avoid taking a direct hit.
Even so, he'd taken a considerable impact. He'd tried to deflect the crewman's fist to lessen the blow, but the man's strength had been surprisingly great.
On top of that, he'd been pretty fast, which was a pain. That movement, he was definitely trained in some kind of martial art.
"That bastard Ed... you just wait."
Ritz was currently grumbling to himself, but he was diligently carrying out his task. He was inspecting the wooden boxes one by one.
Immediately after being thrown into the hold, Ritz had found a lamp and a knife, neatly arranged as if to say, "Please use these." There was even a crowbar next to them.
It seemed the undercover agent had prepared a set there.
Thanks for the consideration... I guess.
He picked them up sullenly, and in his frustration, used the crowbar to open the lids of the wooden boxes in order from the edge.
In the case of large wooden boxes, he had to check the contents as well, which was a hassle. And he had to close them again.
Since it wasn't a large ship, the amount of cargo was limited, but it would take time for one person to do it all.
If there were at least two people, the efficiency would increase dramatically, but that was asking for the impossible.
The hold, where he was confined for the first time, rocked more than the cabin and had no air circulation.
He couldn't breathe the deck air either, which made him feel a bit heavy-hearted, but it was all to get free passage for four people, so it couldn't be helped.
After checking a few, he gradually got used to opening the boxes. So he switched to a method of opening several boxes at once and checking the contents all together.
His work efficiency had improved, albeit slightly.
Sometimes Ritz thought he was better suited to be a thief, a robber, or some other criminal, or maybe a carpenter or craftsman, rather than a mercenary.
It seemed he was a jack-of-all-trades, master of none.
Franz had told him once, "If you're that handy, you could probably make a living as a housekeeper or a full-time househusband even if you quit being a mercenary."
At the time, he'd thought it was a joke, but as he silently repeated this monotonous work alone, he started to feel like maybe it was an option.
In reality, he knew from the start that such a profession was impossible for him, who couldn't settle in one place.
Besides, he'd never heard of a wandering housekeeper. Or rather, what was a wandering full-time househusband? Wasn't that called a kept man?
The sound of the waves repeating endlessly in the dim light, and his own swaying shadow. It seemed Ritz was completely engulfed in some kind of strange atmosphere.
Being alone like this for the first time in months made him remember things he didn't need to remember.
This jack-of-all-trades skill, which Franz envied and Anna admired, was sadly not something he originally possessed. There was no doubt he had a talent for it, but it was all added on later by a certain person.
Ritz, when he had just run away from home, was a man who couldn't do a single bit of housework or Sunday carpentry; his only assets were his good intuition and his brute strength.
On top of that, though his conversation skills were so sharp that he was told his "mouth never stopped," he was a troublesome fellow who could hardly read or write the common language of the Eneonea Continent.
When he remembered those days, his head ached at how ignorant he had been.
There was a woman who had drilled everything from housework and crafting to writing the common language into the past Ritz, who blushed just thinking about it, and had unwittingly turned him into a jack-of-all-trades.
She was Lauren Celosia. Shasta's mother. She had long since passed away.
"...What am I thinking about?"
Ritz, who had been unconsciously reminiscing about the past, muttered that, stopped his work, and let out a big sigh.
On this journey, there was one problem that Ritz couldn't avoid, and that was unconsciously making him remember the past.
It wasn't about Anna, who was his biggest worry at the moment, but about the Ciedena Forest... in other words, the forest of the Clan of Light, Ritz's homeland.
Would it really be enough to just talk to his father, Karl? If it wasn't, and he ended up having to meet the clan's elders, it might cause pain not just for him, but for his companions as well.
Taking a deep breath, Ritz pushed the thought from his mind. There was no point in thinking about it now. What would be, would be; that was all there was to it.
He realized he had finished checking about a third of the entire cargo. It seemed he had been quite absorbed.
Somehow, the ship was rocking more than when he had started working. They must be out in the open sea. It was natural for the waves to be high in the open sea.
He started to feel sick, perhaps from overexertion. In the first place, doing such dull work while reminiscing about a dark past was bound to make him feel unwell.
He vowed in his heart to take out this baseless frustration on Edward when he got out of here.
Ritz, who had been in a cramped position between the cargo for a long time, decided to take a short break and stretched his body slightly in the narrow passage between the cargo.
The hold wasn't designed for a person to spend the night, so he couldn't even easily secure a place for himself to lie down.
On top of that, the ceiling was low, and he couldn't stand up straight.
"Huh?"
Feeling a little dizzy, Ritz reflexively sat down. The moment he caught his breath, he realized for the first time that he was quite nauseous.
Thinking he might be hungry, he tried to stand up slowly, but a wave of dizziness hit him and something rose up in his throat. He hurriedly sat down again.
As he fought back the nausea, a yawn escaped him, though he wasn't sleepy. Ritz knew what this condition was called, not from experience, but from knowledge.
...Seasickness.
Ritz panicked at this first-time experience.
This wasn't his first time on a ship. He'd felt a little dizzy before, but he'd never been seasick.
So what on earth was going on?
Once he started to feel the abnormality in his body and the swaying, it was all over. The world spun around, and every time a big wave came, nausea attacked him.
The hold sways, that's common sense. And the sea isn't always calm. Maybe the sea was a bit rough today.
But he had never expected to get seasick. It was so unexpected that he couldn't even think of a way to deal with it.
"...How many more hours do I have to be in here?"
He groaned and took out his watch from his pocket.
Eleven-thirty.
He'd been locked in here around seven, so it had been about three and a half hours. Until noon tomorrow... twelve hours?
Having already lost the will to get up, Ritz collapsed in the narrow passage.
He still had two-thirds of the cargo left, but what was he supposed to do in this helpless situation?
Frustrated by his panic and confusion, all Ritz could do in his immobile state was sigh. And as he sighed, nausea attacked him.
Maybe it was a good thing he hadn't eaten dinner. If he had, he would have definitely thrown up.
He wanted water at least, but it would probably be useless for him, a stowaway, to struggle.
Just then, he heard arguing voices in front of the hold door. Holding his mouth, he desperately stood up, took the lamp, and extinguished the light.
Even if he was seasick, he knew it was a bad idea for the lamp to be here.
Now, even if the door was opened by some chance, there would be no problem.
In the pitch black, the other tools wouldn't be found, so Ritz collapsed in the passage again. When he pressed his ear to the wooden floor, he could hear the arguing voices from outside the door through the wood, mixed with the sound of the waves.
He couldn't hear what they were saying, but it seemed to be a crewman and a girl arguing.
...A girl?
A bad feeling came over Ritz. He didn't remember seeing a girl on this ship. That was, of course, excluding Anna.
If it was Anna, he prayed, uncharacteristically, that she wouldn't cause any trouble, but as usual, his prayer was in vain.
The hold door opened, and light entered the pitch-black room. At the same time, the crewman's angry shout was clearly audible.
"You get in here too! For the crime of aiding a stowaway!"
At the same time, a girl was thrown in. That girl was, of course, Anna.
He instinctively protected Anna's back with both arms as she was about to be thrown against the cargo. Anna's full weight fell on him, and a wave of nausea rose up, but he desperately held it back.
Unaware of Ritz, Anna retorted sharply to the crewman.
"That's not true! I didn't aid anyone!"
"Shut up, you can tell that to the Military Police tomorrow!"
The door was slammed shut violently, and the two of them were left alone in the darkness.
This was the worst. Absolutely the worst situation.
Why, when he was in such a pathetic state, did he have to be alone in this situation with the woman he loved, the one he least wanted to see him like this?
Holding Anna in his arms, Ritz sighed.
"What... did you come here for?"
He asked in a low voice, holding back his nausea, to Anna, who was comfortably nestled in his arms. Anna, noticing Ritz for the first time, cried out in surprise.
"Ritz! Oh, that's why it felt so soft."
Unable to reply to her overly carefree voice, Ritz relit the lamp he had just extinguished. A warm light dispelled the darkness.
"You had a light. That's good. Franz and I were talking about how sad it would be if it were pitch black. But we couldn't bring Sara-chan either."
Anna, who had moved away from Ritz and was sitting cutely with her back against the cargo, said that cheerfully and happily. It seemed Anna was concerned about Ritz.
But he couldn't help but wish that concern had been directed toward not coming here.
"Answer my question."
If he shouted, he would probably throw up, so he could only ask in a low, quiet voice. Perhaps taking Ritz's attitude as anger, Anna replied in an apologetic voice.
"You were talking about skipping two meals, right, Ritz? I thought that must be hard..."
"...And?"
"So, I brought you some food. And I asked the crewman in front of the hold, 'Can I give him some food?' and he asked, 'Are you this man's companion?' and..."
He could somehow guess how the rest of the story went. Anna had completely forgotten what Ritz had told her before he was taken away by the crewman.
"You answered that you were his companion, didn't you?"
"I did."
The story unfolded exactly as he had imagined, and Ritz slumped his shoulders in defeat.
It was only natural that she would be thrown into the hold. A companion of a stowaway would be considered a person who had aided in the stowing away.
"Didn't Ed and Franz stop you?"
"They were both asleep."
"...I see."
They were both tired. It couldn't be helped. Besides, they probably never expected that Anna, who had been so thoroughly talked down by Ritz, would come to a place like this so easily.
Until now, Anna would have absolutely believed what Ritz said and stayed quiet.
No, was that just Ritz's assumption?
"And besides, I was worried about you, Ritz."
His heart leaped at the overly sorrowful voice of Anna, who looked up at Ritz with an upward glance, assuming she was being scolded.
"...What were you worried about?"
He said that so as not to betray his agitation, and Anna looked down.
"I said I was fine, didn't I?"
"You did, but... the Queen asked me to..."
So that was it, that was why she was worried. Anna's strong sense of responsibility was enough to make him cry. It wasn't that she was thinking about Ritz as an individual; that was just like Anna.
As he sighed, the ship swayed.
"Ugh..."
He couldn't help but groan.
"Ritz?"
Fighting against the unbearable nausea, Ritz silently leaned against the cargo stacked next to him.
This was his limit.
It seemed that catching Anna earlier had been a fatal blow. He was now in a dangerous situation where he might throw up if he opened his mouth.
"Ritz? What's wrong?"
To Anna, who was peering into his face, Ritz weakly gestured with his hand that he was fine. There was nothing else he could do.
He would not be so disgraced as to throw up in front of Anna.
In this dimly lit hold with just Anna, a situation that would normally have him flustered, he was now so far gone that he couldn't even be flustered.
He might not be able to keep up the pretense of not being noticed for much longer.
The ship swayed again. A sudden wave of nausea hit him, and he instinctively put both hands on the floor to endure it. As he endured the rising acidity, sweat that had formed on his forehead dripped onto the floor.
"Ritz, you're so pale!"
He was at the limit of his pretense. He somehow peeled his body off the floor and leaned against the cargo, gasping. It was painful, he felt sick, and he had no idea what to do.
He had never needed to know how to alleviate seasickness before, so he didn't have that knowledge.
"I'm at my limit..."
"Huh?"
Anna peered into Ritz's face, confused. She seemed to have noticed not only his pale complexion but also his heavy sweating and shallow breathing.
"Are you injured? Was it a bad injury?"
He couldn't speak, so he shook his head slightly. But even that made him dizzy.
"What's wrong, Ritz?"
To the flustered Anna, Ritz made up his mind and opened his mouth.
"Seasick."
"Huh?"
She asked back with a puzzled expression. It seemed she couldn't understand because it was so unexpected. He suppressed the rising nausea and said it again.
"Seasick."
After thinking for a moment with a blank expression, Anna shouted.
"No way! You, Ritz?"
"...Yeah. Sorry if I throw up."
"I don't mind that at all."
He swallowed the words, I mind, along with his nausea.
"It's okay, you know? The kids at the orphanage used to throw up a lot when they had a cold, too."
Am I on the same level as the kids at the orphanage? Those words didn't come out of his mouth either.
As he fell silent again and endured the nausea and dizziness, Anna took out a bottle from the one pocket of her one-piece dress.
"Want some water?"
"I'll have some."
He didn't know what would happen if he drank water in this situation, but he was thirsty.
As he reached out his hand unsteadily, Anna gently placed the bottle in his hand. He had thought it was the worst situation imaginable, but maybe this was a stroke of luck.
It felt many times better to have Anna here like this than to spend twelve hours alone.
He managed to take a sip of water, and as expected, a wave of nausea rose up. Perhaps it would have been better not to drink the water after all.
"It's easier if you just throw up when you're feeling sick, you know?"
Anna said as she rubbed his back. But his pride would not allow that. He shook his head slightly to refuse.
"Then you should lie down."
It was a kind suggestion from Anna, but it was now impossible. The passage where Ritz could barely lie down alone was now occupied by two people.
"...Where?"
"Oh... you can't lie down because I came?"
Anna finally realized and asked that.
"That's right."
"...I'm sorry."
"It's fine."
It was no use apologizing now. If apologizing would create a place to sleep, he would have her do it as much as she wanted, but either way, he was stuck here until noon tomorrow.
As he fidgeted, trying to find a more comfortable position, Anna, who had been thinking about something, slapped her own leg as if she had an idea.
"Here!"
"...Huh?"
He looked and saw Anna, sitting sideways, pointing to her own thigh.
"If you use my knee as a pillow, you can sleep."
"Pardon?"
The moment he understood what Anna meant, his mind went blank.
Could this be... a situation that would be incredibly happy if it weren't for these circumstances?
He froze, and Anna looked up at Ritz with a troubled expression.
"Oh, you don't want to? Hmm, I thought long and hard about it. That's right, Ritz isn't a child anymore."
There was no ulterior motive in Anna's actions. For Anna, this action was probably no different from taking care of the children at the orphanage.
If anything, he was the one who was having impure thoughts about the situation.
"Ritz, what will you do?"
Ritz was tormented, caught between the situation where he was about to throw up and the overly sweet temptation.
He certainly wanted to lie down. And for it to be Anna's lap as a pillow was too good of a situation.
But was it all right to indulge in it so readily? Though they were companions, he was still, for the time being, Anna's guardian.
And though he was secretly harboring feelings for Anna that he would never let her know, was it really all right to enjoy such a happy situation so openly?
Regardless of Ritz's inner turmoil, the ship swayed greatly. An even more intense wave of nausea hit him. Ritz broke under the great wave that surpassed all previous limits.
At this point, he didn't care if it was the floor, the ground, or a rock. He just wanted to lie down. And if it was the lap of the woman he loved, that would be the best.
"Sorry, let me lie down."
"Okay."
He half-collapsed onto Anna's thigh. The low ceiling of the hold spun around. Even though it was such a great situation, he had no room to enjoy it.
It had become a little easier, but the nausea didn't subside. He repeated several shallow breaths to desperately hold it back.
"...Is it painful?"
Anna peered down at Ritz with concern.
"Very."
"Just nauseous? What else does it feel like?"
"I'm dizzy."
When he replied dismissively, Anna gently reached out and touched Ritz's forehead. Her cool hand felt pleasant.
"When you're dizzy, you have a fever in the center of your head, they say. My foster father told me that cooling it down makes it easier."
As she said that, Anna kept her hand on Ritz's forehead and chanted a small prayer.
Come to think of it, the man who had raised Anna was also a water spirit user, just like Anna. So it was natural that his adopted daughter, Anna, would be knowledgeable about illnesses and injuries.
"O water spirit who governs healing, please lend me your strength."
He closed his eyes at the cool, pleasant sensation.
The nausea and dizziness that had been tormenting him until just now gradually subsided. It was far from completely gone, but he had somehow managed to avoid the situation of throwing up, throwing up right now.
As he was dozing off with his eyes closed in the pleasant sensation, he noticed that Anna's hand had at some point moved from his forehead and was gently stroking his hair.
It was a slow, gentle touch, as if she were stroking a child.
Normally, he would complain, "I'm not a child," but he was so happy that he had no desire to resist.
If she touched him like this, he felt like he wouldn't be able to let go of Anna when this journey ended.
Even though he intended to disappear from Anna's sight forever after the journey ended and he had delivered this child to the place she desired, after she had learned the truth.
Unlike before, he intended to show his face in the capital frequently for the sake of his aging companions.
But once they parted, though he might watch over her from afar in secret, he had no intention of ever meeting Anna again.
And so he would return to the life he had lived before meeting Anna, a life that would probably anger her.
To be with Anna, he was far too stained. He, who had spent his life on the battlefield, who had traded lives for money as a mercenary.
In comparison, Anna was too pure, a flower beyond Ritz's reach. No matter how much he wanted her, his blood-stained hands could never reach her.
And the age gap was too large as well.
A gentle farmer or a priest like her foster father, who could understand her long lifespan and still make her happy, seemed to suit Anna.
Anna was always saying she wanted to work in the fields.
But what if, by some chance, Anna needed him as her 'one and only person'...
"Ritz, what's wrong?"
Called out, he snapped back from his hopeless thoughts.
He realized that Anna was peering at him, her large green eyes filled with anxiety. She probably thought he had fallen silent because he felt sick.
He opened his eyes and smiled to keep her from worrying.
"Hm? It's nothing."
Being too happy was also a problem. To even think about wanting to spend more time together like this was too much of a luxury.
No, perhaps it was all right to savor these small moments of happiness, on a level that Anna wouldn't notice, just for the duration of this journey?
After all, once he was away from Anna, it would be a happiness he could never obtain again.
Unaware of Ritz, Anna said gently, as if admonishing a child.
"You should sleep for a little while. It's okay, I'll wake you up properly."
"Yeah, thanks."
Ritz fell asleep, savoring an unbelievably gentle happiness.