Chapter 95 - 95: Samuel's Perspective
I, Samuel Emonier, have felt a sense of dissonance for as long as I can remember. I was born the fifth son and youngest child of the Baron Emonier family, but even as a young boy, I apparently troubled my parents by constantly saying, "I don't have a younger sister." I was always more interested in making food than eating it, and while my brothers were running around the mountains, I was always tucked away in the kitchen. And above all, I felt like there was someone more important to me than anyone else, but I couldn't remember who they were—or if such a person even existed.
It was a strange sensation, like a persistent fog in my mind.
The source of that dissonance finally became clear when I was ten years old. I fell into a river while fishing and hit my head on a rock. A flood of memories rushed through my mind, and I realized that I had been someone else in a world that was not this one.
Yes, a past life.
I wanted a sister because I’d had one in my past life. I loved the kitchen because I’d been a chef. And the person I’d been searching for... it was her.
Whenever I recalled my past life, there was always a small, cute girl right behind me. She was always attached to me, smiling happily whenever she found me, and she always delighted in my cooking, telling me how delicious it was.
I think the reason I aimed to be a chef was because I loved seeing her smile and hearing her say, "Delicious! Makoto-kun, you’re a genius!"
She was my precious... my special girl.
Yet, coward that I was, I had turned a blind eye to her feelings. I was older, and I didn't have particularly good grades or looks. I was a perfectly ordinary guy with nothing going for me except my love of cooking. On the other hand, my childhood friend An grew more beautiful every year, and she always seemed to be standing in the bright, dazzling sunlight.
I told myself that by the time she went to high school or college, she would realize her feelings for me were just familiarity, not love. Like a kindergartner with a crush on their teacher, her first real love was still ahead of her. That’s what I kept telling myself.
And I thought that was fine. If An found someone special who would cherish her, I would have congratulated her from the bottom of my heart. As long as she was happy and smiling with those big, sparkling eyes, just like when she ate my food.
But then came that day. When An was about to be hit by that truck, I didn't have time to think. I just ran.
I pulled her by the arm and held her close to protect her. I was desperate to save her, even if it was just her.
My memories ended there. Given that I didn't remember anything after that, I must have died instantly. I wondered if An had survived. That was my only lingering concern, but I never regretted what I did. I’d do the same thing no matter how many times I went back to that moment. My only wish was that An had been saved. I had no way of knowing, but I hoped she was living a happy life in Japan, in that world so different from this one.
As for me, I was quite confused at first, but I eventually accepted my past life and set out on the path of a chef once again. Moreover, I discovered that while this world was different from my previous one, I could still get my hands on Japanese ingredients. I felt like this life wasn't so bad.
Until I reunited with An.
"So Makoto-kun’s name is Samuel now! And you look almost the same, except your hair and eyes are brown. I’m so happy!"
"Yeah. And your name is Anna, which isn't much of a change. You’re as cute as ever, too."
"Wha—! ...Makoto-kun... you haven't changed at all in that regard."
An, who had been crying her eyes out against my chest, was now sitting beside me with a bright smile, clinging to me like a chick that wouldn't leave its parent. One moment she was crying, the next she was smiling, and now she was turning bright red and pouting in embarrassment. But that’s so like An—her expressions always changed so quickly. She really was adorable. I naturally reached out to pat her head, just like I used to. An flinched in surprise, then took my hand and stared at it. "...It’s Makoto-kun’s hand," she whispered happily.
"My hand?"
"Yeah. It’s big, and the skin is a bit rough... It’s a hand filled with more kindness than anyone else’s."
"It’s just rough from always using fire and water. It’s not a very pretty hand to show people."
"That’s not true! These hands make food that can make anyone smile!"
Her words reminded me of what she used to say to me in the past. 'Makoto-kun’s hands are like magic. It’s amazing that you can make such delicious things with them.'
An looked at me with such earnest eyes. Her appearance was different now—yellow eyes and pink hair, nothing like her Japanese self—but I knew without a doubt that the girl before me was An.
I felt a sense of completion, as if a hole in my heart had finally been filled. I was overwhelmed with joy.
After that, we talked about our lives in this world and our memories of the past, trying to fill the gap of the time we’d spent apart. Rachel-jou had sensed the situation and given us the time and space to talk privately.
"...Still, the Saint, huh?"
"Yeah. I was so surprised to find out I’d been reborn as the heroine of that game."
I felt a sense of dissonance at An’s words. Game? What game? An saw my blank expression and burst out laughing.
"No way! You didn't realize, Makoto-kun? This is the world of that game I showed you! You know, the one where the Crown Prince is the main hero..."
"The Prince is the main hero? Oh! You mean that otome game Megu was playing?"
Now that she mentioned it, I did have a vague memory of that. It was so long ago that I couldn't remember it clearly. I knew this world was different from Japan, but it had never occurred to me that it was a game world.
But it made sense. Magic, spirits... now that I thought about it, it was exactly like a game or a manga. I’d grown up with it, so I hadn't felt any dissonance even after my memories returned.
After all, even with my past life memories, I still felt more like Samuel Emonier. An, on the other hand, seemed to have suffered quite a bit before getting here. Now, her memories of An and Anna Carroll seemed to have merged well, just like mine had, but she told me that for a while, she only had her memories of An... and then she had started to lose them.
How much must she have been crying out for help? When I thought about it, I felt a surge of irritation at myself for doing nothing but thinking about cooking.
But more importantly...
"An, you did a great job."
First, I wanted to acknowledge her hard work. I wanted to embrace all the feelings she had been fighting through alone.
I patted her head, just as I used to do whenever she was about to cry. An’s large eyes filled with tears, and she nodded over and over, biting her lip to keep from sobbing.
"Don't hold it back. I’m the only one watching. ...I’m sorry I left you alone. I’m sorry I couldn't save you. ...But I’m so happy I could see you again."
I pulled her head to my shoulder and held her close. An finally broke down and began to cry loudly again. I held her tight until she finished crying.
I won't let her be alone again. I’ll protect her no matter what.
Thank you for the bookmarks, ratings, comments, and typo reports.
Thank you for all the comments on the previous chapter. They were very encouraging! I wasn't sure if there was a demand for it, but I found myself wanting to write Samuel’s perspective, so I tucked it in here. To be honest, I was nervous about how people would react to Anna’s outcome, so I’m relieved to hear that you liked it. They’re a Saint and a chef, so there are still many hurdles to overcome... but I hope they’ll do their best. Next time, we’ll return to Rachel’s perspective.