Chapter 65 - Episode 8: I Shall Turn You Into a Girl
Greetings. I am Violia Nico Fortesia.
I am currently, as always, mass-producing the drug-laced cakes, commonly known as 'Starry Sky Cake.'
When I tried making and selling them in various flavors, they became a huge hit. They are selling so well I am in trouble! (T/N: 'Selling so well I'm in trouble' is a common Japanese idiom for extreme success.)
...Yes. Of course, I do not intend to be a cake shop forever.
We are aiming to participate in the 'masked ball' that is to be held during the Kingdom Festival.
It would be amusing if we could grasp even one or two weaknesses of House Clarino, House Hornbone, or even the royal family there, and since we are at it, I would like to kidnap one or two people from around there and sell them off.
In any case, if there is a place where nobles gather carelessly, it is well worth going.
Therefore.
We must! Hurry! And earn money!
We must hurry and earn money to buy noble titles! And we must make it in time for the Kingdom Festival, which is only ten days away! I am incredibly busy!
"It helps that you are assisting me. You are unexpectedly dexterous, are you not?"
"I am honored by your praise. Well, I'm confident I'm the most dexterous among the people here. A person in charge of intellectual labor has to be able to do this kind of thing too."
...I alone can no longer keep up with the mass production of 'Starry Sky Cake.' Since it cannot be helped, I am having Giovan-san help me too.
The sight of a skeleton man wearing an apron, sifting flour, mixing dough, putting it into molds, and baking it is somehow... no, his handiwork is truly good, and it is helpful, but somehow... it is just something. Yes.
"I am sure Keeb-san is doing well too, so we shall concentrate on making cakes."
By the way, we are confined to the kitchen, but in our place, I have put Keeb-san at the medicine stall on the main street of Windry's capital.
I actually wanted that child and Giovan-san to do the cake making... but that child was fatally bad at cooking. Yes. It was unexpected. But I never thought he would be unable to even crack an egg...
"...Um. I'm a little curious about something."
While I was thinking about whether Keeb-san was energetically tending the shop, Giovan-san asked me with an indescribable face.
"Wasn't it a bit cruel to make Keeb cross-dress, young lady?"
Yes. In setting Keeb-san up to tend the shop, I had him wear a cute outfit.
I had him wear a neat black one-piece dress that perfectly matches his black hair, with a light blue apron in an apron-dress style. I had him wear a large ribbon on his head, a fluffy stole, and then I tried applying a bit of makeup, and he truly became just a beautiful girl.
"That child will continue to go back and forth between the surface and this side. It is not a good idea to expose his face in a place like this."
"Well, that makes sense. So, what's your real motive?"
"He is cute, so I wanted to make him wear cute clothes! It is only natural, is it not?! I am not at fault!"
By the way, Keeb-san protested immensely, but when I said, 'I shall grant you any one wish, as long as it does not involve cross-dressing or concern your life or revenge!', I managed to push it through. I am satisfied. I have no regrets.
"Now, keep your hands moving! We are still far from our target number!"
In order to make a fortune all at once, I plan to sell 'Starry Sky Cake' through consignment. I shall sell them in bulk and slightly cheaper to the merchants who said they wanted to sell 'Starry Sky Cake.'
This is a bit expensive for just a butter cake, and it has an impossible popularity for just a butter cake. Even with this sales format, we can profit sufficiently.
Right now is a time when we want to make a fortune all at once. I do not care if the profit margin drops a little! I shall squeeze out as much as I can all at once!
...In fact, this 'Starry Sky Cake.'
If we sell it for too long, I feel like it will be quite dangerous. It is best to withdraw quickly!
...And so.
I and Giovan-san were cake-making machines, Doran-san and Chesta-san were arms merchants, and Keeb-san was a cute, cute shop girl for six days.
We managed to obtain a decent sum of money.
"For now, we can buy a few noble titles with this..."
Let us settle for this for now. Now, since that is decided, let us return to Orchesta at once for the masked ball! And there, we must prepare to stuff those hateful scoundrels into bags and sell them! I am looking forward to it!
"What about the leftover monsters?"
...However, if we are to withdraw immediately, the problem is what to do with the leftover monsters.
We have released almost all the insect-type monsters, but I still have some left in the bag in the form of eggs and such. After all, if I do not do that, I cannot prepare them quickly when they are needed again later.
And furthermore, monsters like Skeletons and Liches have been kept in reserve. Since those do not multiply on their own and do not starve to death, they are easy to preserve...
"Let us take the Skeleton types back with us. As for the insects, let us just scatter them all at this point. We probably will not be using them anymore anyway."
"Right."
Therefore.
Just before we left, swarms of monsters appeared in the Kingdom of Windry again... but since we are already returning to the Kingdom of Orchesta, it has nothing to do with us!
Yes. And so, we have safely returned to the Kingdom of Orchesta.
The scenery of Elsemarin feels somewhat nostalgic. After all, we were in the Kingdom of Windry for nearly a month.
"Now, from here begins the hell of paperwork...!"
"Let's have the Guild help us where they can."
"Indeed. If we do not do that, it seems like it will never end."
Now then. Two days left until the Kingdom Festival. We shall buy noble titles now! We have enough money! We have enough spirit! There will be troublesome paperwork, but we shall endure it all and somehow get it done!
After having the Guild in Elsemarin forge some documents, we were able to buy noble titles for all of us... Paperwork is truly such a bother. Why is official business so full of tedious procedures?
Well, what is done is done. We are now officially lower-ranking nobles.
...Lower-ranking nobles are, well, a noble title that can be obtained just by paying money. Yes. In short, it is an honor obtained by paying a large sum of money to the country. This country sells honor for money. Ohohoho.
Even if it is a lower-ranking noble, it is technically a noble title... that said, it is only in name; you do not receive territory, and it is a title that is mostly meaningless.
However, to enter a place that displays a sign saying 'Nobles Only,' you must, of course, hold a noble title, lower-ranking or otherwise. That is usually the purpose of people who go out of their way to buy a lower-ranking noble title.
Also, having the title of a noble serves as proof that you 'have money' for the time being. You cannot become a noble without money.
There are two reasons why we bought noble titles this time.
One is to prove that 'people with money are gathered here' and establish a slave market in Elsemarin.
And the other is 'because we probably cannot participate in the masked ball of the Kingdom Festival without a noble title.'
...By the way, since this noble title also serves as identification, as long as we successfully get the lower-ranking noble title with forged documents, all subsequent identification will pass. Of course, there are times when we might be caught by our features. But conversely, it means that from now on, as long as we are wearing something like a full-face helmet, all identification will pass.
Now that we have obtained the noble titles, we shall head to the capital at once. After stuffing our changes of clothes and such into the Spatial Bags, we head to the capital on horseback.
...And on the way, we consult.
"Is a partner not necessary for a masked ball...?"
About the greatest anxiety right now!
"A partner... what does that mean?"
"Ah, yes, yes, Doran wouldn't know. Well, it means that in those kinds of places, you might not be able to enter unless a man and a woman are together."
"For what purpose...?"
"Probably so it's not just a bunch of men gathering."
At Giovan-san's answer, Doran-san began to worry seriously... could it be that Doran-san is confusing a 'ball' (舞踏会) with a 'martial arts tournament' (武闘会)? (T/N: Both are pronounced 'Butoukai' in Japanese.)
"Well, I don't think it's impossible for a single man to slip in. But if you want to sneak in without being suspected, it's better if a man and a woman are together."
"That is true... in that case, not even half of us can get in, can we?"
Yes. The greatest anxiety right now. It is... the bias in the gender ratio of these five people!
"Oh, I'm fine. I'll be on standby outside the venue."
I thought so, and immediately Chesta-san bowed out!
"Even if I go to a ball, I've got nothing to do. I don't get it, so I'll stay outside. That's fine, right?"
W-Well, it stands to reason. Chesta-san does not look like the type who could blend into a ball without feeling out of place. It might be more useful for him to be the one assisting us from the outside.
"...So, the ones entering the venue will be me, Giovan, Violia, and Keeb."
"Eh, I'm going in too? Even though I can't fight?"
"It is enough if you can behave like a noble. The rough stuff will be done elsewhere. Besides, even if we go wild inside, it will only be a little, you know? The main goal is information. Kidnapping people is just a bonus."
Giovan-san usually does not go out for the actual work. This is fresh.
"...Well, if that's the case, I guess it's fine. I intend to be able to behave appropriately to some extent. At least more than Doran."
"That's true."
"Well, you're fine just standing there silently!"
Doran-san has that kind of quality, does he not? Even if he is not thinking of anything, if he just stands there silently, he looks like he is thinking of something. Even if he cannot behave skillfully, he looks like he is unperturbed, so he looks the part. How unfair! (T/N: 'Unfair' or 'cunning' here refers to his natural presence.)
"Then I'll pair up with Violia. I'm not exactly ignorant of those things, but I'm worried."
"Oh, Keeb-san and I are pairing up?"
That was a bit unexpected. I thought it would be better to spread out the magic users if we were to pair up...
...And also.
"Keeb-san and I are no good. After all, we would be two girls, would we not?"
"...Huh?"
"Therefore, since you will be a girl, you cannot pair up with me."
"W-Wait a minute. What? You want me to cross-dress again?"
"Indeed."
It is only natural. If three men and one woman are to sneak into the venue, one of the men has no choice but to become a girl!
"I-It's not like two men can't go in together..."
"It will definitely stand out, you know? If you exclude me and Keeb-san, it would be a pair of a muscular wolf and a skeleton man! It would be tragic."
"Muscular wolf...?"
"Skeleton... What, young lady, is that what you thought of me?"
I do think so!
"No... no, no, no! Then I'd stand out too! If it's found out that a man is cross-dressing, it'll definitely be something terrible!"
"It is alright! Leave that to me! I shall definitely make you into a cute girl so that no one can tell you are a man!"
I have a bit of confidence in that! Keeb-san is cute to begin with! I can definitely make him into a girl!
After that, Keeb-san's fierce protest began. I mostly ignored it. But I could not ignore the last one!
"Violia! When I cross-dressed in Windry, you said you'd do anything I asked, didn't you?!"
"I did say that."
Come to think of it, there was such a thing. Yes. It is not that I had forgotten.
"Then I refuse! What's so sad that I have to cross-dress to go to a ball!"
"It is because we are short on women..."
After that, please curse yourself for being born cute. No, please celebrate it.
"Keeb-san. Listen well. I did indeed say, 'I shall grant you any one wish.'"
In front of Keeb-san with his cute face, I gently speak to him.
"But I also said, 'as long as it does not involve cross-dressing or concern your life or revenge.'"
"Therefore, I reject your refusal! You are going to the ball in a dress! Ohohohoho!"
"No! Absolutely not!"
"Cross-dressing once or twice is the same thing! Now, resign yourself!"
"Why do you look so happy?!"
"It is because you are cute!"
Oh, I am looking forward to the ball! I wonder what kind of dress I should have Keeb-san wear? I have brought various ones, so let us choose once we reach the inn! Oh, I am so looking forward to it!