109 - The Child Stolen by Spirits 2
"Let's stay together like this."
"With us... it'll be fun, for sure."
Two cats sat on my shoulders, taking turns inviting me. If it were just a cute cat invitation, I might feel like accepting, but waiting at the end of that is my 'death.' Just because cats are cute doesn't mean I can recklessly go along with it.
"...That might be nice too, you know. If you're going to depart for the spirit world like this, I'll make your soul pure white. On your next reincarnation, you'll forget all about having been Japanese, and be able to love your parents as a normal child."
I thought it was just a casually murmured remark, but the young man's words made me straighten my back unbidden. I remember being loved by my parents in this life, but I can't confidently answer that I was able to love them back honestly in return. Because of my past life memories, from the moment I was born I thought of them as strangers somewhere inside. It took years after being born before I could think of them as my own parents. Even when it came to being affectionate, I feel like my past life memories got in the way and I couldn't act spoiled like a real child.
"I think being reincarnated is unfortunate. Because of your previous memories, you can't immediately recognize your parents as parents, your speech is impaired... Even you being stolen by spirits tonight, isn't it because of the pride of having been an adult in your past life?"
The young man pointed out that I avoided wearing a costume because I thought it was embarrassing to put on cat ears as an adult. My reasons were slightly different, but in the sense that I ultimately avoided wearing a costume, the young man was right. It was precisely because I was 'me with past life memories' that I avoided the costume.
His tone and expression were gentle, but what the young man was saying felt very harsh. You could even call it rationalism.
...If I died like this, next time I wouldn't have to worry about not being able to understand language right away, or about being exposed as a reincarnated person and sold off.
It was a proposal worth considering. At least, the me from back in Mey Village would have jumped at it without thinking deeply. Without even considering the obvious fact that the parents I'd leave behind would grieve.
"Live with us."
"You won't be lonely... we hate everyone... but there's someone you know too."
"Someone I know?"
As the cats kept whispering on my shoulders, the surroundings suddenly became noisy. Until now the streets had only held me, the cats, and the mysterious young man, but white figures were now walking past us, avoiding us.
"Eh? What? Suddenly people..."
I peered a little into the alleys and streets to see how many figures there were. Tens, hundreds... countless white shadows were walking in a line, heading in a single direction.
"They were here from the start."
"You just couldn't see them."
"Look over there."
"There's someone you know."
Urged on, I looked in the direction the cats indicated, and the head portion of a white shadow gradually formed into an outline. The color was still pure white, but the face was familiar. As I stared trying to remember whose face it was, the white shadow's outline became clearer, the opposite of the young man's face.
"...Village Chief?"
The face that had brought nothing but disadvantage to my parents back in Mey Village was there. There was also a small white shadow nearby, so thinking it might be, I turned my attention that way too. The face of the small white shadow that gradually came into view was the same face as the village chief's grandson.
"Marcel, why...?"
I could see things that were normally invisible. I understood that. In this situation where I seemed to have been stolen by spirits, I was apparently seeing the forms of people I knew to be dead.
...These white shadows, could they be...?
"These are people who died in this area in the past year. They're all traveling to the land ruled by the death god Uaksu, waiting for their souls to be cleansed however long it takes, and then they'll begin their next lives."
It would be easy for me to die like this, apparently. I could start walking with them, or the young man could introduce me and I could be sent straight to the death god Uaksu. Whichever I chose, they said this time they would wash away my memories of being Japanese completely.
...Who?
Suddenly one of the white shadows stopped walking and stared intently at me. The small shadow walking alongside that white shadow also stopped. Several other white shadows noticed them stopping and also stopped, staring intently at me.
...Something about this feels bad?
Was this the pattern where they'd take me along because they envied my being alive? A chill ran down my spine, and I reflexively took a step back. The young man's body was right behind me, and my back touched him.
"Dying like this wouldn't hurt or be painful, but if you feel even a little bit scared, I think you should go back home, even if it's inconvenient."
Gently, the hood with cat ears was placed back on my head, and this time the cloth was pulled down deep over my face. I pulled the hood down hard so it wouldn't fall off again, and the white shadows vanished from my view.
"...My speech is still a little impaired, but it's improving little by little. My father and mother aren't here anymore, but Leonardo-san became my family instead."
When I said this with my face hidden under the hood, the black cat that had been inviting me to stay went silent.
"When my parents died, I couldn't cry at all, but I was still really sad... and I think Leonardo-san, who made me his little sister, would also be sad if his family (me) died."
When I continued like this, the white cat also fell silent and resettled on my shoulder. It seemed both cats had given up on luring me.
"There's a lot I don't understand, and I have to tell lies so I'm not found out as a reincarnated person, but embroidery is fun, and lately I've started to be able to act a little spoiled with Leonardo-san too..."
When I said Leonardo's name, I was overcome with the urge to hug him right away. I wanted to wrap my arms tightly around his chest, or his legs, or his neck, anywhere was fine, and feel safe. A part of me wanted to follow the white shadows, but I needed the thought that I had to go home properly to keep me tethered.
"Leonardo-san, even when I tell him secondhand clothes are fine, he immediately makes new clothes, he makes me multiple pairs of shoes, the stuffed toys keep increasing, I can't even finish all the sweets... even when I tell him he's spoiling me too much, he won't listen at all."
He was someone who pampered and doted on me that much. If I suddenly disappeared, I was actually more worried that he might worry himself to death. Realizing that, even though my life here had some inconveniences, I understood that I had to go back to Leonardo. No matter how you looked at it, even though he treasured me this much, I still hadn't given anything back to Leonardo. I still couldn't call him 'Big Brother' or 'Leonardo' as family.
"...Well then, you have to go back to that person properly, don't you?"
The young man's hand landed on my head with a soft pat. At that moment, particles of light danced around us. As he stroked my head two or three times, the light grew stronger, and drawn by it, my desire to go back, to return home, grew stronger inside me. To go back to my family (Leonardo).
"This is about all I can do to interfere with living humans."
The young man apologized that he couldn't completely wash away the things stuck to my soul. All he could do was give me a small blindfold, so to speak, so that I could live more easily now.
"Look at your feet."
Urged to look down, I saw a line drawn in white ash. The line stretched straight in the opposite direction from where the white shadows were heading.
"Hold your hood firmly and be careful not to let the spirits find out you're human. If you follow this white ash path, it will lead to the home you want to return to, the home you should return to."
He warned me that someone might call out to me along the way, but I must never look back, so I asked why it was forbidden. Was there some rule that if I looked back, I wouldn't be able to return home?
"It's not that you won't be able to return if you look back, but you might not want to return."
"Might not want to return?"
"The ones calling out to you will be your acquaintances who are no longer here. You'll get nostalgic, end up talking, and if the Divine King Festival ends while you're chatting..."
The young man explained that I would never be able to return home. Worse than that, I wouldn't even be able to go where the white shadows were heading, and I would wander this in-between world forever. That's why he said he was always worried whether the human children brought by spirits ever made it home safely.
"Do you want to go with everyone, before you get lost?"
"I won't get lost. I'm going back to Leo's place."
For a moment, I felt a strange dissonance at the words that naturally came out of my mouth. I thought about it a little, but I couldn't figure out what the dissonance was, and it felt weird. It felt weird, but I hadn't said anything strange. I was going back to my family (Leonardo). That was all.
"What about you two?"
The young man spoke to the white and black cats sitting on my shoulders. After showing a slight sign of thinking, the cats on both shoulders said they'd see me off. They'd take me to the end of the white ash path.
"...I see. Then say a proper goodbye."
"We know."
"Won't let her get lost. We'll take her properly."
The cats thumped their small chests with human-like gestures and promised the young man they'd 'leave it to them.'
I walked along the endless white ash path, one step at a time. I just kept walking. The cats who were supposed to see me off didn't seem intent on walking themselves. But they seemed willing to be conversation partners, and along the way they asked me various things. About my father and mother, about what happened after I left Mey Village, about Aurelia, about Leonardo... I told them whatever they asked. As I talked, my homesickness grew stronger, and I quickened my pace without meaning to.
"Kyaa!?"
It seemed I was too impatient. I tripped over my own feet and fell forward hard. Normally I would have put out my hands before falling, but right now I couldn't let go of the hood. I decided I'd just protect my head and take the pain, closed my eyes tight to brace for the impact... but my body was caught before it hit the ground.
...Huh?
"Don't rush. Look ahead and walk properly, okay?"
My body floated up lightly and I was set on my feet. I couldn't see because my hood was pulled down deep, but there was a white shadow person in front of me.
...I know this voice. Who was it?
I tried to lift my face to look at the white shadow, but my head was pressed down from behind. Somehow, it was a nostalgic pressure.
"No, dear. We promised we'd just watch over her, remember."
"Ah, but come on. When she goes bam and falls right in front of you like that, anyone would want to lend a hand."
I realized the person behind me was holding my hood down for me, so I also pressed my hood down deep. From the nostalgic tone of voice and exchange, I understood who the white shadow that had helped me was. The young man earlier had said the white shadows were 'people who died in the past year.' It hadn't even been a year since Leonardo took me in. So if they had died within a year, it was possible.
...Oban-san and Auntie Ulary.
The two people in Mey Village who had doted on me like their own child were right beside me now. Feeling nostalgic, I tried to lift my face, but this time a different hand took mine.
"If you dawdle, the path will disappear! Don't rush, but don't stop walking!"
A well-postured white shadow began walking, pulling my hand along the white ash path. I couldn't see the face since I could only see the back, but I recognized the brisk way of walking.
...Royne-san.
Royne, who had kindly helped me with various things in the Words Disease patient quarantine zone, was pulling my hand. In Royne's other hand was a white shadow about the same height as me. Perhaps because I didn't know their face, even when I looked, I couldn't tell what they looked like.
...Ah, they smiled. I could tell they just grinned, for sure.
I could see the boy smiling proudly, as if boasting "My mom's a good woman, isn't she?" Royne's child's name was, I recalled, 'Teo.' Royne's well-caring child seemed to be an easygoing kid too.
After that, every time I almost stumbled or wanted to rest, various people appeared and urged me on. They took turns warning me to rest after I got home, just keep walking, don't rush, don't fall. Sometimes they even thanked me for the Memorial Service, so maybe the people I'd seen off back then had come to see me off.
...Do they really not trust me that much?
Every time I was warned, I felt nostalgic, happy, and sad. Eventually, when I passed through the townscape, the white ash path split into three. Beyond the three forks, I could see scenes on the other side of fireplaces, like square windows.
"Huh? Which one should I go?"
I hadn't heard that the path would split. I'd only heard that I should just go straight along the white ash path.
"Which way?"
I turned around without thinking to ask, but there was no one behind me anymore. I'd been told not to look back, that if I looked back I wouldn't want to return, so maybe this was the right thing. But I wanted some kind of clue to decide, so I asked the cats on my shoulders.
"This window is the hearth of home."
When I peered through the window the black cat was explaining, I could see inside a house wrapped in warm orange light. My supposedly dead parents were there, laughing happily together.
"If you go back home, everything disappears."
"It becomes like it never happened."
That sounded kind of scary. The window showing a scene that couldn't possibly exist anymore was probably better not to choose.
"This one is the witch's house hearth."
"This hearth is dangerous. There's fire in it."
When I peered through the window explained as the witch's house, I could again see inside a house wrapped in warm orange light. It was Aurelia's house, where I'd been left for a while after leaving Mey Village. I could see Aurelia arranging some dried leaves on the table and using a mortar.
"This is the current house with a marker."
"This hearth has a dog waiting. Everyone's waiting."
Told it was my current house with a marker, I remembered Bart from this morning. He had cleaned the living room fireplace so that even if I was stolen by spirits, I could find my way back. For the final touch, he had spread a thin layer of ash and should have left the handprints of both my hands there.
Among the three, I peered into the one dark window. The scene beyond the window was dark because the fireplace wasn't lit, but I could tell some black lump was looking this way.
...Ah, Kokumaro.
It was a puppy with black fur in a dark room, but the white maro eyebrows on its forehead stood out. When our eyes met, Kokumaro stood up with its tail perked up as usual.
By the way, if she jumps into the fireplace where her parents can be seen, it means she died when the village was wiped out. It would also mean she never met Leonardo. Next will be Donadona Leonardo or a side story from Hermine's perspective. Probably.
Typos and missing words will be handled another day... I'll skip the 26th update.
Typos and errors have been corrected where I found them.