31 - Swallowing Lead
Leaving Waiyakku Valley swaying on horseback, the trees that had no swelling buds when we came were now lush with young leaves. I had been at Aurelia's for over a month, so it might be natural for the trees to change that much. When I waved goodbye to the Black Knight at the watchtower, the Black Knight waved back.
Most of the journey was silent, but during breaks Alf often talked to me. I felt this was also practice for me, who wasn't good at speaking. Whenever I stumbled over words or misspoke, Alf would politely correct me.
...Alf-san's pronunciation is really pretty.
Easy to hear, easy to imitate. It felt a bit similar to Father's pronunciation.
While occasionally practicing speech, the journey progressed quickly. The silence during travel might also be because I couldn't afford to open my mouth for fear of biting my tongue. Not Alf's ease, but mine. On the horseback that swayed more than when I rode on the way there due to the fast pace, I didn't feel I could leisurely chat.
Around noon on the fourth day after leaving Waiyakku Valley, we finally arrived at our target city. Grenore City, visible in the distance, felt like it was halfway between forest and plain. According to Alf's explanation, apparently only Grenore Fortress existed there long ago. Houses were built around it for the knights stationed at the fortress, shops lined up for daily life, merchants' families settled down... and it became one town. At some point, the fortress lord thought the town would be in trouble if enemies attacked, so he surrounded the town with walls. They thought this would protect the town's safety, but more people wanting to move to the now-safer fortress town gathered, overflowed, and a new town formed outside the walls. A place that was originally just a fortress had apparently turned into a large city before anyone realized it.
...Fortresses are places you hole up in during war, or use to attack, right? Is it okay for them to become cities?
In my past life, I was born in an era without war and never went to conflict zones myself. When I think of war, I have images of air raids and tanks, but I somehow associate it with the Warring States period. Images of armored samurai swinging swords at each other. Since that's about the extent of my imagination, I naturally don't have accurate knowledge of fortress usage. Still, I somehow felt the situation of a fortress and city being together was problematic. In a war, a city would be attached to a fortress that enemies would attack.
...Thinking the other way, maybe it means knights who would protect you from enemy attacks are right nearby.
Swaying on horseback, I observed the people passing by. They wore cleaner clothes than the people of Meiyu Village and didn't stink. This must be as Leonardo said when he mentioned bathing culture was rooted in the city. Because they have the habit of bathing, their skin and hair are clean.
As we clip-clopped through the town, the horse turned away from the flow of people. When I asked about it curiously, I was told that the city wall gates were divided into gates for merchants and commoners, and gates for knights and soldiers. Apparently it's more efficient to separate the gates for merchants entering the city for business to deliver goods to shops, and soldiers whose only purpose is heading to the fortress. Receiving such an explanation, we passed through the knights' gate. There were guards standing watch, but Alf wasn't stopped.
...That's what they call getting in by face alone.
Past the walls, a straight road continued. High walls flanked both sides. Maybe they had uses like luring enemies into a maze during emergencies, or dropping stones or spears from above. Feeling oppressed by the walls on both sides, I proceeded along the road, and suddenly both sides opened up. The building before me was larger than the elementary school I attended in my past life. Just in terms of grounds, even if you put school building x2, playground x2, twenty-five-meter pool x2, plus a gymnasium and auditorium, it still wouldn't be enough. The scale was too different.
...Ah, the fortress is also different from what I imagined.
That couldn't be, but since my insufficient imagination had me picturing a Japanese castle, what was before me looked more like a Western-style castle than a fortress. However, the building itself had no ornamentation, so this was probably a fortress after all. A place for knights and soldiers to base themselves during battle.
Entrusting my horse's reins to another Black Knight, I was lifted from the horse into Alf's arms. I wasn't set down on the ground because I had lost my sandals. Aurelia's house had no toddler shoes, and the adult sandals I borrowed were lost when I wandered through the forest after being startled by a rotting corpse. For a while I used Aurelia's shoes, and after Aurelia's back healed, I used thick cloth wrapped around my feet as makeshift shoes. So walking on the ground hurt my feet a bit, but walking on wooden floors or carpets was no problem.
Carried in Alf's arms, I entered the fortress. The Black Knights who passed by made strange faces of surprise or laughed, which felt surprisingly friendly.
...But still, it's pretty tense here.
The Black Knights who passed by would momentarily soften their faces at seeing a little girl, but quickly tighten their expressions and return to their original work. The knights moving through the hallway also all seemed to be walking quickly. When I strained my ears, I could hear voices here and there.
—More medicine has arrived from the valley witch! Check it.
—Supplies are limited. Distribute only to those with hope of recovery.
—Infections have also appeared from Squad Six. They've already been quarantined, but since there's an incubation period, we need to quarantine all other Squad Six members who haven't shown symptoms...
—What about checking the brothel?
—New infections of three prostitutes have been confirmed. Notice of brothel suspension has been issued.
—A message from the Sedovara Church. As expected, the specific cure for Wards' disease has been lost even in the neighboring country. The Sedovara Church seems to be continuing their deciphering efforts to see if it can be revived somehow, but the Nihongo left by Yuta Hiragi is too complex...
Just by listening carefully for a bit, I could pick up various pieces of information. I'd heard the term Wards' disease for the first time, but it was probably the name of the disease that destroyed Meiyu Village.
...If I could read Japanese, could I cure that disease?
A feeling suddenly rose in my chest. If I could read Japanese, I might be able to help somehow. That kind of giddy feeling.
...But there are kanji even I can't read. And if Yuta Hiragi-san's handwriting is too calligraphic, I doubt I could read it. And characters from the Edo period, even if they're the same Japanese, I don't feel like I could read them.
I can read Japanese. But the Japanese that Yuta Hiragi used and the Japanese I can read aren't necessarily the same thing.
...Even if I said "I can read Japanese," I don't think anyone would believe the words of a little girl like me. And if Yuta Hiragi-san was a person from long ago, even the remaining prescription would be as old as an ancient document, right? I doubt they'd let a little girl touch something so important, and even if they showed me, I might not be able to read it...
Thoughts denying the idea that I could help kept flooding my mind. If I said I could do it and then couldn't, I couldn't take responsibility for that. It would be one thing if I just read a prescription, but there was no guarantee the medicine made according to it would work.
...Aurelia-san taught me to make sure I don't get found out as a reincarnated person.
In the end, using Aurelia's advice as a shield, I chose to keep my mouth shut. People's lives were at stake, but I closed the lid on the possibility of helping.
All I had was possibility. There was no guarantee I could definitely help.
I couldn't risk my own safety on something that might be completely pointless. No matter whether the medicine succeeded or failed as a result of betting on that possibility, there was one thing that would definitely happen. I would be ignoring Aurelia's advice not to be found out as a reincarnated person, and would be announcing myself as a reincarnated person. I felt like Alf and Leonardo had said the treatment of reincarnated people who could read Japanese wasn't bad, but I didn't know how much I could trust that. A reincarnated person who could read Japanese, with no family, and young, if I were in power, I'd keep them caged.
...It feels disgusting.
I decided to keep my mouth shut to protect myself, but it still felt bad. I was abandoning people who might be saved by my own choice. My mood sank heavily, as if I had swallowed lead.
When we arrived at Leonardo's office, Alf finally set me down. The hallway in front of the office was carpeted, so it didn't seem like it would hurt to walk with just cloth wrapped around my feet. That was probably why Alf set me down. I followed Alf as he knocked and entered the room. Hiding behind Alf's long legs as I explored the room, I saw a man with his hair swept back and an intimidating face at a solid-looking office desk ahead.
...Scary!? Who!? Alf-san, didn't you bring me to Leonardo-san's place!?
I had assumed Leonardo would be inside, but sitting at the desk was an unfamiliar man with an intimidating face. Confused, I found myself looking back and forth between Alf and the man.
"Finally back, Alf. Tina, it's been a while too..."
With raised eyes and long strides, the intimidating man walked toward me. If I met a bear, I might feel this kind of terror. Desperately suppressing the urge to run away, I put on a social smile and clung to Alf's leg. This man's face was too scary, but if he was Leonardo's superior, I couldn't be too rude.
...I'm a child, so it's fine. Even if I get scared and cry a bit, it's fine. I'm a child right now. It's not unnatural. I'm a child. Little girl, it's okay!
Since I was a little girl, even if I flinched reflexively when the intimidating man reached out his hand, or hid behind Alf, it couldn't be helped. I squeezed my eyes shut with all my might and clung to Alf's leg.
"...Tina?"
"You haven't seen her for half a month, so maybe she forgot?"
"Don't be ridiculous..."
"No, when I went to Aurelia's house too, she froze for a moment like she didn't recognize me."
Closing my eyes and calming down a bit, I felt the conversation between Alf and the man above me had a voice I'd heard somewhere before. His face was too scary to look at directly, but I'd definitely heard that voice somewhere.
"...Leonyaldo-san?"
Wait, did I maybe do something incredibly rude? I cautiously opened my eyes. When I slowly peeked out from behind Alf, there was Leonardo's face with his eyes drooping apologetically.
...Because his bangs were pushed back, I didn't recognize him at first! I'm sorry!!
Also, when his bangs are up, he really is scary, I added internally, as Leonardo's hand hesitantly reached toward me. His face was scary, but I couldn't fail this time. Staying still without moving, I was lifted up into his broad chest. Our eyes met at the same level, and we stared at each other silently for a while. After completely mistaking him for someone else and panicking, I didn't know what to say.
...Anyway, it's Leonardo-san's fault for having a different hairstyle than usual. A person's features change depending on whether they have bangs or not.
I completely shifted the blame for the mistaken identity onto Leonardo and pouted with pursed lips. It was definitely not that I was embarrassed about the mistaken identity and trying to cover it up. It was Leonardo's fault.
"Eih!"
"Wah!?"
Unable to find a first word, I reached out to Leonardo's hair out of irritation. When I roughly messed it up, the hair that had been neatly swept back with product fell forward.
"...Nn, after all, Leonyaldo-san."
With his bangs down, his face became familiar, and I let out a sigh of relief. Even though I knew it was Leonardo, I felt unsettled being held by an unknown intimidating man.
"Are you mad that I left you at Aurelia's for half a month?"
Leonardo supported my weight with one hand and quickly fixed his hair with the other. This hairstyle was apparently Leonardo's work mode.
"Hairstyle, different. Thought, stranger."
I deliberately avoided mentioning that his face was scary. Since I was aware I'd already failed once at that, I wouldn't step on a known landmine.
As we briefly exchanged recent news while I was held, the topic of shoes came up. When I said I came like this from Aurelia's house, I was moved to a chair and my feet were measured. Leonardo handed a memo to Alf, who left the room.
"...Should I, leave? Work, get in the way."
"If you sit quietly, you won't be in the way, so can you wait over there?"
"Okay."
If he said to sit quietly and wait, I'd sit quietly and wait. I looked like a little girl, but inside I was an adult. Sitting still was nothing.
Or so I thought. Even if my insides were an adult, sitting quietly in a chair from noon until nearly evening was tough.
...I'm not a doll, you know! Even for me, sitting still for nearly four hours is too much!
I could not speak, not interfere, and sit still, but my bladder definitely had its limits. When I got down from the chair at my limit, I met Leonardo's eyes. Leonardo, who met my gaze, widened his eyes in surprise for a moment, then guiltily looked away.
...Ah, I get it. You forgot I was here, Leonardo-san.
Wonderful concentration. If only he hadn't forgotten telling a little girl to "sit quietly."
"What's wrong, Tina?"
After plenty of time had passed, this was his first words in hours. Now, how should I answer? I had plenty of things I wanted to say, but as I was thinking, my stomach let out a pathetic "guu."
"...Tina? Come to think of it, lunch..."
"Haven't eaten."
I arrived around noon, was sent straight to Leonardo, and was told to sit quietly and wait here. Naturally, there was no opportunity to eat lunch. In response to my answer, Leonardo looked out the window once, then put his head in his hands.
I remembered while writing that elementary schools in the countryside are unnecessarily spacious.