316 - Unsent Letter
Thanks to Jasper, the Snow Cap mushroom material for the Pant medicine was safely obtained, but extremely disappointing news also reached the detached palace. The Sedovara Church apparently took the lead in going to the Saenard Kingdom to collect Adorutoru eggs, but it seems crossing the border took too much time, and by the time they reached the Adorutoru habitat, the eggs had already hatched. What was needed were unfertilized eggs, so the chicks hatching itself was no problem at all, but even if unfertilized, an egg is an egg. It seems all of them were eaten by the parent Adorutoru birds as nutritious food, and by vermin like snakes that target eggs. There was also a postscript saying they would try searching a bit more stubbornly, but it probably cannot be expected.
...Damn you, Saenard Kingdom.
I know it cannot be helped, but I cannot help but resent someone. I need the Adorutoru eggs that are laid in spring, but if I really cannot obtain the eggs like this, my return to Grenore city will be confirmed as delayed by a full year. I have already been away from Grenore city for nearly a year as it is, and I do not want to extend this cramped capital city life any further.
...I was prepared for the Laroche pollen to take at least half a year, you know! Not being able to obtain the spring-only Adorutoru eggs is too harsh!!
Depending on the season, even the Laroche pollen would require waiting a year, but I am choosing not to think about that. Since Aurelia originally procured it as a product, there is a possibility that someone who knows Laroche pollen can be a product is collecting it, so I felt I could be more optimistic about it than the Adorutoru eggs.
"Is there no choice but to leave earlier, or to wait for the border tension to return to normal?"
"If Leonardo doted on his sister enough to jump the gun and conquer the entire Saenard Kingdom, it would be quicker, but..."
"I think that is a bit too much to ask, honestly."
I pouted and glared at Felicia. What do you take my brother for? My brother is an inflexible stickler for rules. No matter how cute his little sister (me) might be, he would not go against Christoph's will and invade an enemy country more than necessary. If the enemy attacked, he would drive them back to the border, but I am certain he would not start a war from our side.
"Regarding this failure, it seems the Sedovara Church within the Saenard Kingdom is also inclined to protest to the Saenard King."
There are no borders for the followers of Sedovara, the god of medicine arts, and they usually show flexibility when it comes to medicine. If the border tension causes delays in crossing, and that in turn delays the revival of the secret arts, the Sedovara Church will likely consider various forms of retaliation. At its root, this tension was caused by a Saenard Kingdom noble causing a disturbance in the city of Lagarette.
"I think the Heavenly God is cold to me."
"The Spirit's Favored Child is supposed to be a being loved by the spirits, but..."
It seems I am loved by the spirits, but not loved by God.
The border tension is the Saenard Kingdom's fault, but me deciding to make the Pant medicine is my own fault. When we were deciding which medicine to attempt reviving during the meeting that took days, I whined for them to decide quickly, and as a result, I left it to luck and chose the Pant medicine.
"Father said you could choose again, did he not?"
"He did. But I said the Pant medicine would be fine, because I chose it myself."
"Then it is Christina's responsibility. It is neither the Heavenly God's fault nor the neighboring country's."
Felicia admonished me to give up, and I shrugged my shoulders. Even without Felicia admonishing me, I know. When I think about it deeply, it is my responsibility for choosing this Pant medicine.
"From now on, I will act a bit more carefully."
At the very least, I will not leave things to luck. I will seize my own destiny with my own hands.
When I declared this with some lingering dissatisfaction, Felicia smiled beautifully, and left behind a single report as a so-called gift.
"Wow... we really are in a state of tension with the Saenard Kingdom, are we not?"
I was genuinely surprised by the report Felicia left behind, but in that moment Hermine's expression grew stern, so I straightened up. My natural self that slips out no matter what is a commoner country girl. That is fine for being the sister of the commoner Leonardo, but it is not good for being the sister of the knight commander who oversees the fortress. I scored failing marks as the daughter of a Merit Peerage family, and I am probably no good as someone who received a detached palace from the King either.
...Being a lady is hard.
"Even under this much tension, they did let us through the border, so I think the Saenard Kingdom side was actually being accommodating," Ulrika said as she poured tea, explaining that apparently travelers are now completely refused entry, and even merchants cannot cross the border unless they can prove they are citizens. I had heard the border was tense, but I did not think they were even restricting merchants from entering. I could understand if they were just tightening interrogations to watch for spies, but merchants are people who transport goods. They apparently do not want to let foreigners inside, even if it means cutting off the flow of supplies from outside.
"I did not realize it had gotten this tense."
"No, I think it has progressed even further now. The planting season is almost over, and it takes time for information to reach the capital."
Since the information that reached the capital from the distant border was that merchants have begun to be turned away, Ulrika says the movement of merchants has probably been completely halted at the site. Because the means of communication are messengers using horses or birds, there is inevitably a time lag in information reaching the capital (this side).
"...Is it really not a hair-trigger situation?"
I was thrown into confusion by the suddenly all-too-real word "war," wondering if Leonardo at the fortress guarding the border was alright. Leonardo is a knight. I had heard there was war in this world, and I hear there have been wars even in the eleven years since I was born, which I simply did not know about. Leonardo has even earned meritorious deeds in those wars, but up until now I had never really felt the reality of my own brother going to war.
"I thought war was something the Kings (the important people) worked hard to avoid as much as possible..."
"Our country and the Saenard Kingdom have had bad relations since our founding, so even a small spark can lead to war."
If anything, Ulrika seemed more surprised that they had managed to hold off war for over a year this time. The nature of weapons is different from my previous life on Earth, so the rulers' thinking about war seems different too. In my previous life, there were weapons that could end everything in a single shot, so the rulers first tried to solve problems through discussion, and even if that failed, they applied pressure through non-military methods like economic sanctions. The use of military force was truly the very last resort.
But this world seems different. In a world where wars are fought with swords, shields, and horses, the number of casualties is limited, and rather than spending time on discussion, they seem to decide victory and defeat in an instant through military force.
...But the one actually standing on the battlefield would be my brother...!
Filled with restless anxiety, I could not stay still and began pacing around the room. I had never really felt the reality of him being a knight or earning meritorious deeds in war, but Ulrika saying it would not be strange for war to start at any moment made me truly understand the situation Leonardo was currently in at the border. Just seeing real swords clashing at the martial arts tournament was terrifying enough, and yet, somewhere I do not know, my brother might be fighting for real, not as a competition, but for his very life. I hear Leonardo is strong, very strong, but that does not mean he cannot lose to anyone.
No matter what, my heart would not settle. To calm down, I sat in a chair, then stood up again immediately. As I was repeating this, Rebecca took pity on me and brought some stationery. If I was worried, I should just write a letter to Leonardo, she said. With war approaching now, I probably cannot send a reply through official channels, but knowing Leonardo, he might hide his reply in a report like he did before.
"That is true. Whether I send it or not aside, writing a letter might help calm my heart."
I made an excuse to myself, saying Leonardo had also told me he wanted letters from me. I do not actually want to send a letter to Leonardo at the fortress where he is working, just because I feel lonely and anxious. But if I only write a letter to pour out my anxieties and do not actually send it, it should not interfere with Leonardo's work. For the letter I actually send later, I can just write innocuous content that will not make Leonardo worry.
The letter I wrote with those thoughts, filled with messy emotions, was tucked into the belly of the Black Dog stuffed toy, without even needing to ask Hermine to proofread it. I can burn this letter once Leonardo returns safely. That is what I wished for.
The act of writing down my anxious feelings on paper greatly helped calm my heart. Whenever I remembered that Leonardo was on the battlefield, I would still pace around the room with anxiety, but I felt I could quickly regain my composure now. Was this what Hermine had once called controlling one's emotions? It seems to be an essential skill for a lady.
...Need practice, huh.
I separated the part of me that worried about Leonardo from my heart and the part that needed to behave as a lady. Perhaps because I needed to think about two things at once, I was able to regain my composure on the surface.
The production of the Pant medicine came to a complete halt while waiting for materials. There is simply no way to proceed until we can obtain Adorutoru eggs next spring. Hoping that Laroche pollen might arrive in the meantime, I placed my expectations on Cody's efforts while writing a reply to Basilia's letter that arrived from Lagarette. She was thinking of staying in the capital again this year, but it seems Basilia's mother and Jemian's legal wife are opposed to their daughter being away for too long. They say the time children remain at their parents' side is short, so at least during childhood, they want her to stay with them.
"...Have you been seeing that child often lately?"
"That child?"
As I headed to the entrance after the guard dogs' walk, I saw a familiar cat hood on the other side of the hedge. Assuming the cat-headed boy was looking this way again, I prompted with just my gaze, but Kalisa tilted her head at the sight of the cat-headed boy.
"...That is not that child, it is Dietfried-sama."
"Huh?"
At the familiar name that came from Kalisa's mouth, I could not help but compare the cat-headed boy's face with Kalisa's. Kalisa's face was as serious as always, and the cat-headed boy was still wearing a cat hood as usual. I could not see his face because of the hood, but apparently beneath it was Dietfried's cute face hidden away.
"Why is Diet wearing such a strange hood...?"
"Who knows?"
Knowing the person inside was Dietfried piqued my interest a little. Up until now, I had been pretending not to see him, wondering if some strange person had started following me again, but knowing who it was gave me some peace of mind. Peace of mind, but...
...Seriously, why is he like that?
Realizing he was being looked at, Cat-Head Boy renamed Dietfried did the very obvious thing of clutching his head, hiding his face with both hands, diving into the hedge, and peeking out with only his hooded head visible.
He apparently thinks that is hiding.
...What happened in the two years I did not see him!?
I do not think I am wrong for thinking that.
Will fix typos and errors at a later date.