kscans

Chapter 151 - Satou, a Man Concerned About the Tourism Industry

"Alright, first things first. Dr. Kawasaki, I've got a reward for you."

"A reward? I don't see any reason I should receive one... if anything, I just caused you trouble."

The trouble she meant was probably making me waste my time on something so ridiculous. The fact that she wasn't even considering how she'd prevented Kyoto's ambitions from succeeding was just so very Dr. Kawasaki of her.

"I'm a member of the Mutual Aid Society too, you know. This is my thanks for letting me in on this weird little scheme."

"Uh huh."

Even after I explained it, that was her response. I took some top-tier metals like adamantite and orichalcum I had stocked in my pocket dimension, mixed them together, and instantly forged a special alloy. Using that, I created figurines of Devil Kaiser and Sugar King, then produced them on the table.

"K, Kaiser!? And Sugar King too!! A, are you sure? A gift this... this wonderful..."

"Yeah, don't hesitate. Take them."

"Yay!!"

Watching Dr. Kawasaki immediately start playing with them... I don't know, it sort of stirred my paternal instincts. I think it's a little weird myself, but I think I get it now. This must be what they mean when they say the more trouble a child is, the cuter they are.

"Now then."

"!"

Ichijo's shoulders shot up with a jolt.

"You've got some nerve, pulling a stunt like this."

"Ah, um... well, that is..."

"I just got put through hell at work, and on top of that, I've had some shocking things happen in my private life. And you're trying to honey trap me, of all people?"

"Th, that has nothing to d-"

I snapped my fingers.

"Ah! What do I do, what do I do! This is bad, how am I supposed to turn this around!?"

Ichijo's face contorted dramatically as her own voice suddenly echoed through the room.

"It's fine, you know? You don't have to talk. I have plenty of ways to make you."

I can project her inner voice for all to hear.

"There's also the option of cutting your head open and messing with your brain."

I could even overwrite her personality with one that's completely obedient to me, then conduct my interrogation. As I laid out the various plans, Ichijo's complexion turned deathly pale.

"Which one do you prefer?"

"...I, I'll tell you everything honestly, so please, I beg you, spare me..."

"OK. As long as you're being reasonable, I won't do anything too terrible."

She's just an errand girl, after all.

"My, my superiors ordered me to entrap Satou-san and win you over to Kyoto's side."

Apparently, if they failed to win me over, their worst case scenario was to at least get me to stay neutral if a conflict broke out between East and West. Sure, I'm a slob. I mess around with women quite a bit. But did they really think I was stupid enough to make a fatal mistake over a woman? They're really underestimating me.

"If that's how you wanna play, then how about I use my favorite pastime, playing with women, to completely ruin Kyoto?"

"R, ruin it..."

"Among my one hundred and eight so-called special moves, there's one that can permanently change a person's sex."

I'll use it to physically transform every single person in Kyoto's underworld. Men will become women. Women will become men. Every last one of them. It'll be my first attempt at leaving the mind as it is while changing the body... but I can probably pull it off.

"And then I'll add this."

"Wha!?"

Ichijo's kimono burst apart, replaced by a perverted costume that would get her reported to the police in a second if she walked outside in it.

"Furthermore, how about I use a curse to compel your actions?"

"M, my actions...?"

"If someone offers you a monetary transaction, you won't be able to refuse."

Don't worry. I won't let them go too far. I'll make it so you can't be bought for something like a hundred yen. I'll set it up so a deal can only be made for an amount that matches the person's looks.

"I'll also make it so you can't do things that are forbidden in normal, legitimate businesses."

If a customer tries to do something unreasonable just because they're in a position of power, they'll get hit with a penalty. I'll make sure the working conditions are impeccable, so I hope you'll all apply yourselves to your duties with peace of mind.

"You won't find another place like it, no matter where you look in the worlds of light or shadow. A city that's one giant red-light district."

Underworld tourists from all over the globe will come flooding in, won't they? That's right. As a condition for entering Kyoto, I'll require them to use legitimate public transportation.

"The tourism industry will be booming!!"

Since they've come all the way to Kyoto, they'll probably enjoy the regular tourist spots too. It'd be a waste not to. Underworld folks are loaded. They'll probably drop a lot of cash. Oh man, won't this do wonders for restoring Kyoto's finances?

"While I'm at it, I'll set a quota. If you don't meet the daily target amount, you'll stay that way for life!"

And all the earnings will go straight into my pocket. Satou-kun's pockets will be soaking wet...

"Wait, this might actually be a good idea."

"Please have mercy! I'll seriously do anything, just not that! Please, not that!!"

Ichijo threw herself to the ground in a kowtow. It was a servile prostration, the kind you'd expect from a total lackey. Well, I figured as much, but her initial Yamato Nadeshiko act was all a performance. Then again, she's a honey trap agent, so I guess that's a given. By the way, even as we're having this conversation, Dr. Kawasaki is still playing with his figures. He's not listening to a word we're saying. I'm torn between thinking "Seriously, this guy..." and "That's Dr. Kawasaki for you."

"Tch. So? What exactly are the folks from the West plotting?"

"About that... I'm sorry. I don't know the specifics."

...Well, I wasn't expecting much, but I guess she really doesn't know. It makes sense. Someone like a honey trap agent would be the first to be cut loose when things go south. They wouldn't let someone like her in on any important information.

"I do know, however, that it's a plan involving armed conflict."

"I figured."

They were trying to recruit me with the assumption a fight was going to break out. They probably think that even if this part of the plan gets exposed, it won't be a big deal. They can just make excuses, saying it was just some subordinates acting on their own and asking where the proof is.

What a naive outlook.

It's true the Mutual Aid Society probably can't make a strong move at this stage. At most, they'll send some spies into the West. But it's far too naive to equate the Mutual Aid Society with me. The only reason I'm a member is because I don't have a reason to quit. Do they really think a guy like that will stay quiet when someone picks a fight with him? Did they misunderstand because I obediently follow requests from the government or the Mutual Aid Society? No reason to quit, no reason to refuse, that's really all it is to me. If I wanted, I could just waltz into Kyoto, kidnap all the bigwigs, force the information out of their heads, and then sell them off to the Mutual Aid Society.

Well, I don't plan on doing that for now.

I have some fun things scheduled in the near future. It'd be a pain if the underworld got all chaotic from a squabble right now.

"Anything else?"

"...This isn't confirmed, but there's a possibility they may take some kind of action against those close to you, Satou-san."

"Oh?"

I see, I see.

"For now, you're my dog. A double agent. You can do that, can't you?"

"...I will do as you command."

"Oh my? You don't sound very happy. You're a honey trap agent, so do you prefer the adult entertainment industry after all?"

It seems lonely for you to do it alone, so I'll include every underworld person in the West. Good grief, what a selfish person. But I don't mind becoming the savior who rescues Kyoto's finances.

"I will do it with pleasure! Wow! Being a spy sounds so exciting, doki doki!"

That's the spirit.

"Oh, are you done talking? In that case, Satou-san, let's play together."

Dr. Kawasaki... you... Just look at Ichijo. She's staring at you with dead eyes.