kscans

Chapter 148 - Chaos

In conclusion, I was able to get tickets to Tokyo very smoothly.

I never knew Dad was so knowledgeable about bullet trains and regular trains... According to him, he hasn't been on all those business trips for nothing.

Anyway, Erina-san and the others naturally received invitation letters for the briefing as well. But the professor is busy with university matters, so unfortunately, she won't be attending.

It was decided that the three of us—Erina-san, Mia-san, and I—would go together... but I never imagined I'd get lost at Tokyo Station and have to be rescued by Erina-san. It's a subtle shock to the system.

There are just so many people in Tokyo. I thought I knew where I was on the map, but when I tried to move, I was swept away by the human tide and ended up somewhere I didn't recognize. When I tried to find a landmark, a wall of people blocked my view of everything.

"The population density in Tokyo is really insane..."

"It was always crowded, but I heard the number of people flowing in has increased after the stampedes in Chiba and Saitama."

"The Self-Defense Force's defenses are strongest in Tokyo, after all. This place isn't immune to stampedes either, but it's not surprising that people would gather here."

"Well, a lot of it is just that many people are on summer break!"

Unlike me, Erina-san and Mia-san moved through the crowd with practiced ease.

I should have the advantage in terms of kinetic vision and reflexes, but I was using all my effort just to avoid bumping into people.

'Hehehe. How do you like Tokyo, Kyouta-kun? Feeling like you're about to puke from the crowds?'

"I'm not going to puke, but I do feel like my stamina is being drained away."

'It is a harsh environment for us creatures of the shadows. I hope you enjoy it to the fullest...!'

"Did you have some bad memory in Tokyo or something...?"

'I threw up.'

"Ah, I see."

While having that conversation, we took a taxi to the hotel.

It's currently a little past noon on Saturday. The briefing is tomorrow morning, so we have to head back right after it's over. The day after tomorrow is Monday, after all.

Normally, with summer break having started, students would have plenty of free time. But our high school's schedule is off by a month because of the demons.

Even though we came all the way to Tokyo, we don't have much time to hang out. Still, Erina-san is full of energy, suggesting we go here and do that.

Tokyo has an absurd number of stores. I ended up being dragged along for window shopping as an escort for two beautiful women, but whether I should call this a perk of the job or a disaster is unclear.

...That aside, I've decided to stop worrying about how ridiculously luxurious our hotel room is.

I knew it would come to this the moment I decided to stay at the same place as them, just in case a stampede occurred.

These two really were raised well... This is the first time I've ever stayed in a room that costs a six-figure sum per night.

But I digress. The day after having the strange experience of being scared by how comfortable the hotel bed was, we arrived at a place called the Kasumigaseki Central Government Building.

...Why does Tokyo have so many train lines? Is this a labyrinth?

"I could never live in Tokyo..."

"Ahaha... I had the impression that young people would rather want to live in Tokyo."

"You're plenty young too, Senpai. But I get how Kyouta feels. It's easy to blend in because there are so many people, but that also means there are more eyes and ears. As a ninja, it's a double-edged sword of a place!"

"Not a ninja..."

'His comebacks seem to have lost their edge. Does this mean he won't resist no matter what I say? Yaaay! Kyouta-kun, you socially awkward, wimpy virgin!'

"Would you prefer a wooden sword or a hammer for your souvenir?"

'The fact that they're both blunt instruments is terrifying me!?'

While having that stupid conversation, we showed our briefing envelope to a staff member and were guided to the venue.

It seemed we would be using a conference room within the government building, which made me feel a little nervous. Places like this that scream 'government office' just seem to have a tense atmosphere. Even the employees we passed on the way looked like they had dead eyes.

Ten minutes before the scheduled time. I thought we might have been a bit early, but I could hear people talking from beyond the door.

After thanking the staff member who guided us, I gently opened the door.

I wonder what the other 'B-Rank candidates' will be like. It would be nice if they were all kind people—

"Hey, hey, hey! Is that ridiculously huge afro of yours empty!? You got no brains in there, huh!? The size of it is a public nuisance! That diameter should be taxed!"

"Aaaah!? You talkin' to me!? You got a wooden splint in place of a brain!? Every time you turn around, that pompadour of yours is about to hit someone! It's almost two meters long, damn it!"

"Hah... hah...! How is it, my lady? My sitting posture...!"

"Be quiet. Don't talk to the chair. You just stay there and let me sit on you. I'm trying to suppress my own urges over here...!"

"Hahiih! Ah, the ropes are digging in...!"

"So noisy. Do these people have no social decorum...?"

...I gently closed the door, but my uselessly good kinetic vision had already clearly registered the scene inside.

First, there was a person with an afro like a balance ball and another with a pompadour about two meters long. Both were wearing long school uniforms that you only see in TV dramas.

Next, there was a duo consisting of a beautiful cat-eared woman in a butler's uniform tied up in tortoiseshell bondage, and a beautiful girl who looked like the quintessential 'young lady' with a dress and blonde ringlet curls, who was on all fours beneath her.

And then, a muscular, middle-aged man wearing a cowboy hat, a tie, socks, and Stars and Stripes boomerang-style speedos. I think I saw star-shaped pasties on his nipples, but I want to believe I was mistaken.

...Is this an illusion?

"Erina-san, Mia-san. It seems we're under attack from an Awakened Person who uses illusions."

"Kyouta-kun. Weren't you able to nullify things like that...?"

"That's the strange part. It looks completely real. My skill is recognizing this as reality. The user must be incredibly powerful."

"Let's just face reality."

"I don't want to...!"

I don't want to open this door again...!

As I was on the verge of tears, Erina-san gently patted my shoulder.

"Kyouta."

"Erina-san..."

"This looks so much fun...!"

"You've got to be kidding me."

Her eyes were sparkling in a way that would be drawn as 'shiitake eyes' in a manga. Only now did I remember that this self-proclaimed ninja was one of them.

Because, just a moment ago, she was wearing a lovely, Taisho-roman style hakama.

But in the time it took for me to close the door and escape from reality, she had equipped a flag that said 'The Invisible Ninjas have arrived☆!' and a sash that read 'The Ninja of Ninjas! The Greatest Ninja of the Reiwa Era!'

Stop it, don't try to make me wear them too. Don't waste your Item Box like that! Why did this girl bring multiple sets of these things!?

"Tanomō! The 'Invisible Ninjas' have now arrived!!"

"Stop. Please just stop."

"I'm starting to want to pretend I don't know her...!'

Ignoring our anguished cries, the self-proclaimed ninja strode confidently into the room. Someone, please help me.

At the entry of this utterly bizarre existence, the dozen or so men and women inside glanced our way before collectively turning their faces away with expressions that said, 'Ugh. A weirdo came in. Let's not get involved.'

Hey, are you kidding me? For the record, you guys are way weirder. Is this place an expo for freaks and weirdos?

For Erina-san, in her super-hyped state, to just blend in... that's saying something. Is this place actually inside a dungeon?

"Heh. It seems you're confused."

I was suddenly addressed and turned my gaze to the left wall.

There stood a woman in a white tuxedo and a mask. She was leaning against the wall, striking some kind of cool pose.

Her outfit was as outlandish as something out of a manga, but the space was so warped that she looked normal.

Because even further beyond her, in the corner of the room, there was another boy in drag who was being whipped by a gir—no, judging by the bone structure, a boy in drag, and was saying, 'Thank you!' with a huge smile on his face.

Is there anything but shock value here? Even a one-hit wonder comedian would think about the future more than this.

"When people gain the power to survive even when detached from society, they tend to unleash their previously suppressed emotions."

"Uh, huh."

"It is an inescapable karma... the original sin of humanity..."

"I-I see..."

"To put it bluntly, they unleash their 'crazy gauge.'"

"You don't say."

The woman chuckled under her white mask. What is this chuunibyou patient?

I don't want to get involved, but for every step I take back, she takes two steps forward. Someone, please help me...!

"I'm glad to have someone I can actually have a conversation with."

"Aren't you just as bad...?"

"This excitement... I can no longer suppress it...!"

"Are you listening to me? And aren't you about to unleash your own crazy gauge? Don't give in, reason!"

"You!"

Suddenly, the woman in the tuxedo flung open the front of her jacket.

"Won't you do it with me!!??"

On the inside of her jacket were dozens of decks of cards. It was clearly Yu-Gi-●h.

"Tell me what kind of monsters you like! If you have your own, great! If not, I shall lend you one!"

"Uh, sorry. I'm not really familiar with TCGs..."

"I see."

"Yes. So if you'll excuse me."

"So you're a beginner. Then I shall gently sink you into the swamp!!"

"Pushy sales tactics lead to the decline of the content, you know?"

"Gah...!"

"Your actions are giving the game itself a bad image."

"Guh, haah...!"

The pervert coughed up blood under her mask and collapsed.

That color wasn't real blood. It was probably food coloring. Why do you have that stuff prepared?

"The trauma...! I was just calling out to kids on their way home from cram school, saying, 'Won't you play with big sis,' but I was unjustly chased by a police officer all night long... the trauma...!!"

"It was justified, you idiot. Get arrested."

"I'm not a guy... I'm a big sis... I'm still young...!"

What is this abominable life form? Do you live in the deep sea?

I slowly backed away and approached Mia-san, who had, at some point, pressed herself flat against the wall, feigning non-involvement.

"You just casually used me as a decoy, didn't you?"

"I'm sorry. But I thought you might be used to this kind of environment..."

"I'm not used to it, and if I were, the subjects would be your sister and your cousin, you know?"

'Hold on a moment. Even I am not that pathetic a life form.'

"No, just remember the time you were made to cry by an elementary schooler. From an outside perspective, you're pretty similar."

'Wh-What did you say...!?'

The pathetic beauty who challenged an elementary school girl to a card game in the park, played dirty, and got into a scuffle, collapsed on the other end of the telepathy. ...I think.

Meanwhile, Erina-san was handing out business cards. What is that girl doing?

"Domo, we are the Invisible Ninjas! Please remember our name today! The world's greatest ninja group, the Invisible Ninjas! We have three members here today! All the executives are gathered!"

"Hold it right there."

I grabbed the self-proclaimed ninja by the scruff of her neck and dragged her forcibly to the wall.

While I was at it, I gave a slight bow to the afro and pompadour guys who had been confused by the business card. Sorry about our idiot.

"What are you doing?"

"I wanted your vote when we decide the village chief by election."

"So the ninja village is a democracy, you say? No, that's not the point, you fool! Don't drag us into this! Mainly me!!"

"No! Was the promise we made to the setting sun, to build a ninja village together, a lie!? Kyouta!!"

"May that sun never rise again. I don't know anything about it."

"Liaaaar!!"

Erina-san fell to her hands and knees, wailing. When I looked at Mia-san, she gently averted her gaze.

Face reality. She's your cousin. Please take responsibility for her.

'Hey. Erina-kun just said all the executives are gathered, but what about me?'

"Eh, you're the advisor."

'Then all is well!'

The pathetic one who had just recovered was saying something, but as long as they can sort it out among themselves, I don't care anymore.

I'm starting to get a headache. In the room, the pompadour and afro are calling a truce to confront a mohawk with spiked shoulder pads, and the Stars and Stripes Boomerang Man has started a staring contest with an old man in a loincloth.

The cross-dressing butler in bondage and the young lady getting excited as a chair are having a heated discussion about candles with the boy-in-drag S&M duo from the corner.

What is this? ...What is this?

My brain can't keep up, or rather, it's refusing to comprehend. Now that I remember, wasn't that S&M boy-in-drag duo in the PV?

Did the Dungeon Agency actually use them? Is the Dungeon Agency sane?

But then again, in this crowd, they seem relatively tame. What is this? Is this hell?

As I stood there stunned, the door opened and three new people entered.

I turned my gaze, wondering what kind of perverts would appear this time, and saw that it was 'that girl with the twin tails.'

A beautiful girl who seemed even more lively than on screen, small yet radiating a strong presence.

Next to her, smiling gently, was a busty and beautiful elf girl with a calm demeanor.

Walking diagonally behind them was a beautiful girl with gray hair tied in a ponytail, looking bored.

It was the three who had stood out the most in the Dungeon Agency's PV. The others seemed to be paying attention to them as well, as the noisy room fell silent for a moment.

At that moment, a different door from the one we had entered through opened.

"Everyone, thank you very much for waiting. We would now like to begin the briefing concerning 'B-Rank Adventurers.'"

The person who appeared was a man in his thirties or forties with the handsome face of an actor, but with eyes that couldn't hide his exhaustion.

Faced with this scene that could only be described as chaos, he offered a polite smile.

"My name is Akasaka of the Dungeon Agency. It is a pleasure to be here with you today."

I see, so this is the famous Director Akasaka... I think I remember seeing him at the interview.

The briefing for 'B-Rank Adventurers' was finally starting. As everyone took the nearest available seat, I broke out in a cold sweat.

Wait, the briefing is starting now? I have to process serious information now?

My brain, which had just been flooded with useless information, let out a scream.