kscans

Chapter 162 - Modern Adventurer Life

"Were you, by any chance, picked up from under a bridge?"

"Would you prefer a sword or a fist?"

"I’m sorry! It was a joke!"

It was the night of the day my parents Awakened. A vein throbbed in my temple as I listened to the utterly thoughtless remark of a hopeless college girl.

"You know, there are jokes you can say, and jokes you can’t."

"Yes…"

"That kind of thing is seriously not funny. At worst, it could lead to a real fight."

"Yes…"

"Also, when you say things like that, it makes it hard for me to know how angry I’m allowed to get, so please just stop."

"Yes, I’ll reflect on my actions…"

Arisugawa Aira is an illegitimate child! Born from her mother’s affair, she’s a half-sister to the younger one! Her real parents committed suicide together, and the letter her mother left her said, ‘You should die too’! On top of that, her communication issues stem from a complex about ‘not being loved by her parents’!

…Her past is so heavy!!

It’s a bad joke no matter who says it, but when she says it, it’s just not funny…

"Big Sis. Even I have to say, that was a bit much…"

"S-Sorry. But the difference in stats and skills between Kyouta-chan-kun and your parents is just too massive."

I had asked Aira-san to use `Appraisal` on my parents, who had just joyfully Awakened today.

The results were:

"They both have perfectly ordinary stats. As for skills, your father has ‘Mana Conversion: Wind’ and your mother has ‘Clairvoyance,’ just one each. It’s a mystery how a ‘SSR’ like you was born from two ‘C’s (Commons)."

"Don’t compare my parents to the lowest rarity."

To be blunt, neither of my parents was very strong.

My dad’s `Arcane Gear` looked like a medieval common soldier’s, and his only skill was a one-trick-pony mana conversion. Looking at his mana pool, he wouldn’t be able to use it repeatedly.

My mom’s `Arcane Gear` was a set of black top and bottoms with a dark brown fur cloak, and matching leather gauntlets and hat. Her weapon was a sniper-type crossbow.

I looked up her skill, `Clairvoyance`, and it seems to drastically improve eyesight. Furthermore, it apparently grants a high degree of spatial awareness.

Both skills are strong in their own right, but on their own, they’re just ‘decent.’ In terms of both stats and skills, I’d say they’re ‘F-Rank.’

But still, the important thing is that they were able to Awaken.

Having average abilities means that if they try hard, they can pass the adventurer exam. After that, as long as they level up, they should be able to defend themselves to some extent.

"If anything, it made me feel the blood connection with my parents even more strongly."

"Ah, you mean that Awakening method. Yamadera-shi is currently being bombarded with questions from the trainees about when you’ll be coming next."

"Even if you tell me that… While it’s true that their mana was already flowing more easily thanks to Professor Yamadera’s training, I think the reason they Awakened so smoothly was because of our blood ties. It didn’t work very well for the others."

The mana vessel… a part of a person that is close to the ‘soul.’

Interfering with it isn’t that difficult. That is, provided you can accurately grasp the flow of mana and have the means to slightly alter that flow, even if it belongs to someone else.

However, applying significant force to the vessel itself is extremely difficult.

The soul is protected by the vessel of flesh, and further within, by the wall of the spirit. Pushing on the vessel to expel mana was a terribly nerve-wracking process. It’s one thing for a few people, but for more than ten, it’s really tough. I went through several rounds that day, so I was truly exhausted.

Among them, the only reason it was so easy with my parents was likely because our mana properties were similar.

I did the same for the others, but none of them Awakened. Well, maybe if I did it dozens, or hundreds of times, they might Awaken eventually. But in that case, they might as well stick to the traditional training methods.

"I’d imagine so. I have no intention of seriously doubting your blood relationship with your parents. Furthermore, for the two years since you Awakened, you lived in the same house and ate the same meals as them. One of the known cases of Awakening involves spending a long time with a high-potential Awakened Person. It’s likely that a combination of factors led to this success."

"That’s the rough theory that comes to mind, but…"

"If everyone could be satisfied with that, there would be no quarrels, no murders, and no wars in this world!"

"You’ve got a point."

Yep, I’ve decided. I’m not going to Professor Yamadera’s place for a while.

He was already someone I didn’t want to be too involved with, what with all the talk about sperm donation. Why on earth should I have to listen to an old man whisper such things in my ear?

…Though I admit, my resolve wavered for a moment when he offered to ‘take me to one of those naughty establishments’!

For the record, right after making that comment, the lecherous old monk got a serious scolding from the professor. The fire even spread to me, as I was told, ‘A minor shouldn’t be interested in such places.’

But I digress. I don’t care about that mad old man. I’m grateful he was conducting my parents’ Awakening training, but that’s that, and this is this.

"So, my parents are currently healthy. Is that correct?"

"Yes. There was nothing particularly unusual about their stats. Yamadera-shi has some medical knowledge, but he didn’t say anything either, did he? And if there are no problems from your perspective with your eyes, we can conclude that your parents are in good health."

"I see… That’s a relief…"

"Kyouta-chan, you’ve been worried about that this whole time. What were you so concerned about?"

I cleared my throat before answering Erina-san, who had long since dropped her high-class lady mode.

I had to switch gears myself, or I felt like I might start stuttering.

"It’s not very common, but some skills have been confirmed to have side effects. For example, a skill called ‘Rampage Eating.’"

"Eh, what kind of skill is that?"

"Apparently, it allows your jaw to open beyond its limits, and your chewing ability, swallowing ability, and digestive organs are all significantly enhanced. To the point where you can munch on thick steel plates. You also become more resistant to poisons and curses than a normal Awakened Person, so there’s no worry about food poisoning."

"Whoa. It’s like something out of a manga!"

"That’s a power you’re not supposed to use on monsters, right…?"

"Right. And what’s more, everyone who has this skill is apparently plagued by an ‘abnormal appetite’… Even people who were originally anorexic are now in a state of constantly eating something."

You could say that the body and mind are being pulled along by the skill.

It’s a bit of an occult-like story, but ever since the `Day of Awakening`, everyday life has been occult anyway.

The current leading hypothesis is that ‘skills reside in the soul, and the soul is beginning to overwrite the body and mind.’

The ‘shape’ of the soul can be influenced by the body and mind, but the ‘power’ of the soul surpasses both.

Honestly, it’s all Greek to me. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to understand its essence. But I can accept the ‘phenomenon’ and the ‘result.’

"I was just worried about what would happen if my parents ended up with a strange skill and got into trouble…"

"Yes. It’s not just skills; there’s even a term now, ‘species accident.’ I hear it’s tough for people who’ve turned into rabbit beastmen. Infidelity, custody battles, and all that."

And here she goes again with a story that’s hard to react to…

"It seems that just because you Awaken, it doesn’t mean life is smooth sailing."

"It’s pretty obvious when you think about it! But I see. In that case, I can understand why Kyouta-chan was worried."

"Yeah. Still, in today’s world, I thought it was better for them to Awaken."

I don’t know which has a higher probability: manifesting a weird skill, or encountering a monster overflow. But my parents have already had near-death experiences with monsters twice.

Even with the risks, they needed power.

"By the way, how much did your parents’ appearances change? Their species didn’t change, so I imagine it wasn’t a dramatic transformation. I’ve only met them once before, so I can’t really tell the difference."

"Ah, right. Their skin tone and hair quality have improved. My mom was happy that her ‘age spots disappeared.’"

At a glance, I’d say they look about five years younger. There’s a photo in the living room from a family trip when I was in elementary school, and they look pretty close to how they did back then.

My dad’s middle-aged paunch has shrunk quite a bit too. His belly is still a little soft, but he’ll probably get fewer scoldings at his health checkups now.

"Hmm, hmm. I’d love for them to become younger in both body and mind and mass-produce a little sister or brother for you. That way, we could find out if ‘SSR’s like Kyouta-chan-kun are a standard drop, or just a fluke."

"Don’t turn my parents into a gacha game. And besides, I’d hate to get a little brother or sister at my age."

If that happened, I’d seriously consider moving out. Why should I have to live in a house where my parents are holding their ‘nightly sports festival’?

…But then again, if I left home, I’d be worried if another overflow happened in the neighborhood.

"…In that case, I’ll have to soundproof my room as much as possible. And I’ll need to buy some good earplugs and headphones…"

At the very least… at the very least, I have to wait until they can properly defend themselves…!

"C-Calm down, Kyouta-kun! It’s not like that’s a sure thing yet!"

"Kyouta-chan’s voice sounds like he’s dying…! I bet his face is all wrinkly right now!"

"Right. Shall I send a soft-shelled turtle hot pot set to your house? And some eel, and oysters…"

"I’ll kill you."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa."

While putting a stop to the hopelessly rich and capable college girl, I nodded at the words of Erina-san and Mia-san.

They’re right. Even if my parents are a loving couple and have bodies that seem rejuvenated after Awakening, there’s no way they’d get that carried away!

No way! I want to believe!!

＊　　　　＊　　　　　＊

The day after my parents Awakened.

"To Ā-chan and Shī-chan’s promotion to D-Rank, cheers!"

"Cheers!"

We gathered at the Arisugawa residence for a small party with just our group.

The reason was just as Erina-san had announced: Busujima-san and the others had been promoted.

"Um… are you alright? Yagawa-kun."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"You just seem… tired."

"Hahaha. No, I’m totally fine."

Busujima-san spoke to me with a worried look.

The truth was, I was so worried about my parents having a ‘sports festival’ last night that I couldn’t get much sleep. This body of mine is ridiculously tough, so a night or two without sleep shouldn’t be a problem. It seems I was just mentally exhausted.

Still, I couldn’t let one of the guests of honor worry about something like that.

"Hey, Kyouta-chan! Did you have fun last night! With your parents!"

"Here you go, Aira-san. Tabasco sauce drizzled with Tabasco sauce."

"That’s just Tabasco sauce, isn’t it!?"

With a bottle of Tabasco in hand, I crept towards the hopeless college girl.

It’s fine. An Awakened Person can chug it and just have a sore throat for a while, unable to speak. I know because some idiot Awakened Person posted a video of it.

So it’s not a problem. Now drink up, you hopeless college girl…!

"It’s a joke, a joke, Kyouta-chan-kun…!"

"There are jokes you can say and jokes you can’t… I think I said this yesterday. Time for punishment."

"Sto-o-o-op! Help me, Mia, I’m being attacked by a ruffian!"

"Don’t make me sound like a criminal."

"Big Sis."

"Yes."

"Let’s just apologize, okay?"

"Yes. I’m sorry."

"You’re forgiven."

But there won’t be a next time. If she says something weird again, I’ll switch that bottle of booze she’s holding with the Tabasco.

Speaking of which, bringing alcohol to a place full of minors is… ah, it’s non-alcoholic.

"What’s the matter, Kyouta-chan-kun? Did you really think I could stand here sober in front of a bunch of high school girls? If you were to take this bottle away from me, I would simply curl up into a pill bug on the floor."

"What kind of threat is that?"

"Hee hee hee… My communication skill is a ‘point five.’ And that’s at full power, so rest assured."

"Where’s the reassuring part in that? Could you at least get it above ‘one’?"

"You think I have the communication skills of a full-fledged person?"

"…I’m sorry."

I sincerely regretted my own cruel words.

I gently placed the Tabasco on the table and lowered my eyes.

"Even if it’s self-deprecating, that reaction is a shock. And why did you even bring Tabasco in the first place?"

"I figured you’d say something thoughtless, Aira-san…"

"My words were predicted…!?"

She looked surprised, but how long did she think we’ve known each other?

…About four months. I was surprised myself at how short it had been.

We’ve been through so many intense experiences, and for better or worse, I’ve seen so much of her disappointing—or to put it nicely, endearing—side that it feels like we’ve known each other for a long time.

"Still, Big Sis’s social anxiety has improved quite a bit, you know?"

"Mia-san."

With a glass of juice in hand, Mia-san joined the conversation.

Dressed in a frilly blue shirt and black jeans, her good figure gave her a mature air.

Honestly, sometimes I lose track of which of these sisters is the older and which is the younger. Aira-san is wearing a hoodie and shorts now, but she usually wears a tracksuit. Not that the hoodie is any less casual.

"She can now say more than ten different words to people in her research lab! That’s wonderful growth!"

"Hey, hey, stop it, Mia. You’re making me blush."

"So it was less than that before…?"

And is ten words something to be happy about? Is it a miracle just to see a sign of growth?

"How did you manage to get through university life like that? I hear it’s tough for college students if they don’t have connections, with reports and all."

"Hmm? If you pay attention in about half your classes, things like that are a breeze. As for everything else, you just have to shut them up with your results. I can proudly say I haven’t borrowed Granny’s power."

Or rather, is Professor Arisugawa the only one you can borrow power from…

Beautiful, great figure, excellent grades, and a well-off family. With specs like these, you’d think she’d be getting offers from all over the place.

The fact that she’s either avoided or pushed them all away just goes to show how deep-seated her issues are.

"There are no struggles in university life aside from human relationships. Right, Mia?"

"Shut up, I’ll kill you."

"Mia!?"

Oh no, Mia-san is so mad she’s breaking character!

It seems the hopeless college girl’s comment touched a nerve.

"M-Mia? What’s wrong? Have you come to hate your big sister?"

"Just for now, it seems so. Shall I stuff my underwear in your mouth?"

"Why my underwear in my mouth!?"

"It’s a common thing."

"Calm down! That only happens in 2D!"

Mia-san slowly closed the distance, while Aira-san held her hands out in front of her and backed away.

Getting involved would be a pain, so I moved over to today’s guest of honor, Busujima-san.

"Well, sorry about that. Those hopeless sisters."

"Oh no, not at all. It’s fun to watch people messing around."

Busujima-san giggled. I’m sorry, but that might go beyond just messing around.

I vowed to stop them by force if things were about to get ‘R18G.’ If it turned ‘R18,’ I would do my utmost to escape the premises.

…And I’ll crush the desire to watch from start to finish with my reason!

"Yagawa…"

"!?"

A ghastly voice from behind made my shoulders jump.

I turned to see Ooyama-san glaring at me, her sharp eyes even more slanted than usual.

"I heard from Erina, you bastard…"

"Eh, what? Oh, congratulations on your promotion."

"Yeah, thanks."

"Thank you."

For a moment, Ooyama-san returned to normal, and Busujima-san didn’t seem to care about her friend’s state at all.

What is this? Is this normal?

"So, some old geezer you don’t even know asked you to ‘give him your sperm,’ huh…!"

"Bffft—"

Ah, this is normal.

Instead, Busujima-san and Mia-san choked and froze. In that moment, Aira-san hid behind Erina-san.

"Don’t mess with me. You won’t give any to me no matter how long I wait, but you’re going to give some to an old man? Is that all our bond means to you?"

"I have no plans to give any to either of you, though?"

"I thought I… would be the one to make weapons with your sperm…!"

"First of all, a young lady your age shouldn’t be repeating the word… uh, a man’s that."

Just listening to it is making me feel weird. Ooyama-san has a cute face, and she’s well-endowed.

Honestly, when she brings up topics like that, I don’t know where to look. Especially since I’m the only guy here.

…Let’s not think about it. If I think about the gender ratio, I’ll want to curl up in a corner of the room.

"Shizuku-san! Y-You shouldn’t say things like that so loudly!"

"Th-That’s right! It’s indecent! Ky-Kyouta-kun’s sperm! At the very least, let’s save such comments for the nighttime!"

"Mia-san. You’re not drunk, are you? Mia-san."

I took a few steps away from Mia-san, who had at some point snatched Aira-san’s non-alcoholic beer.

"And Erina-san. Why did you have to tell her something like that?"

"I thought it would be for the best!"

The self-proclaimed ninja puffed out her chest with her hands on her hips, a smug look on her face.

Her chest, which had a strong presence even through her kimono, jiggled with a tayun.

Damn it, I have no choice but to forgive her…!

"A-Ahem. Changing the subject, how did you two manage to clear the goblin dungeon? I believe that’s still the condition for promotion, right?"

"Y-Yes. We had Mokuren… the golem we got from Yagawa-kun in a trade, step on all the traps for us…"

Good, it seems Mia-san isn’t drunk yet.

The two relatively sane members of the group managed to change the subject.

"The so-called manly way of disarming traps. Well, the armor needed repairs afterward, though."

"I see. But without a scout-type, that method of disarming is necessary. Depending on the situation, it might be better to have another golem, don’t you think?"

"That would create a mana supply problem…"

"It’d be great if we could get our hands on one of those Magi Batteries from the club, but that’s impossible."

I breathed a sigh of relief as the conversation shifted to a more serious topic.

But then again, it feels strange that a conversation with words like ‘dungeon’ and ‘monster’ is considered a ‘serious topic.’

Two years ago, that would have been the stuff of games and manga. Now, it’s a topic for serious meetings among besuited bigwigs in the Diet and the UN.

How the world has changed.

I tilted the glass in my hand, moistening my mouth with orange juice.

If my parents pass the adventurer exam, I’ll have to help them level up. And in parallel, I need to earn money and experience in dungeons myself.

With school added to the mix, it’s going to be pretty tough.

"Kyouta-chan, Kyouta-chan!"

"Yes?"

Erina-san, with Aira-san still clinging to her back, approached me with her usual sun-like smile.

"Let’s start getting serious about preparing for the culture festival soon! Specifically, selecting Kyouta-chan’s costume!"

I could feel my face contort into a grimace.

Seriously… we’re really doing this…