kscans

Chapter 89 - A Grandmother's Worry

As I lay there, completely drained from the etiquette lesson, Professor Arisugawa returned, having finished clearing away the dishes.

Instinctively, I straightened my posture and forced my still-unfocused eyes forward.

"You can relax. The lesson is over, and I won’t say anything if you slouch a little."

"That’s right, Kyouta-chan-kun. You need to chill out."

Aira-san, stretching her legs out from her position on the cushion, laughed breezily.

"You are far too relaxed, Aira."

"Yeah, Paisen! You should be more ladylike!"

"Erina. Your own manner of speaking is quite something as well…"

"Nyah nyah. See, you got told off too."

"No way! Obaa-chama! What part of me isn’t okay?! I’m a great ninja!"

"Everything about that last statement, I should think…"

"?!"

"Hmph… you’re still a long way off, Erina-kun. Your ladylike power doesn’t even come close to mine—a lady among ladies. The kind of sheltered maiden whose name appears when you look up ‘invincible beauty’ in the dictionary."

"Hup."

"Gah?! Baba-sama, not the calf! Don’t poke my calf right now—?!"

"Is something the matter, invincible beauty Aira-chan?"

"Nnguoooooh?!"

Professor Arisugawa gave Aira-san’s leg, which must have fallen asleep from sitting in seiza, a light poke with the tip of her shoe.

Watching the three of them, I had a single thought.

This is incredibly awkward.

What was I supposed to do in the middle of this family in-joke? To make matters worse, I was the only guy in a room full of beautiful women and girls. I was in enemy territory. Totally, completely, out of my element…!

Beside me, Miyoshi-san turned to me, her cheeks slightly flushed.

"I’m sorry, Yagawa-kun. It seems Obaa-sama is in unusually high spirits today…"

"Ah, no. Please, don’t mind me…"

It was awkward looking at Miyoshi-san right now. It just reminded me of that lewd nun outfit, an affront to religious figures the world over.

Calm down, Yagawa Kyouta. Save the detailed recollections for when you get home…!

"She’s not usually one to ignore a guest, but today is the first time in a while that all of her grandchildren are together, so…"

"I see."

Miyoshi-san smiled apologetically. I’d heard that she was living alone now and that things with her family weren’t going so well.

Because of the issues with her mother, it had been difficult for her to face Aira-san, so she had probably only recently started visiting this house again.

Seeing her granddaughters safe and sound must have made Professor Arisugawa overjoyed.

"Nngggrrrrr…! Ogooh?! C-cramp…! On top of it being asleep, it’s craaaamped…!"

…That aside, is that disappointing college student really okay? She’s writhing on the floor with an expression no lady should ever make.

Ignoring the not-so-safe state of her granddaughter, the professor gave a small cough to clear her throat.

"My apologies. Yagawa-kun, please, relax. You don’t have to be as bad as my disappointing grandchild, of course."

"Ah, yes, ma’am."

"She’s right, Kyou-chan. Want me to give you a shoulder rub? I can soak you in sake, too!"

"Are you trying to tenderize my meat…?"

What is this? Am I going to be eaten? Literally?

My cheek twitched as Erina-san crept closer from behind.

"That’s all for today’s lesson. Erina and Mia, please carry the incapacitated Aira to her room."

"Roger!"

"Understood."

"W-wait, wait…! Erina-kun is fine. But I can’t let Mia see my room…!"

"Why not, Nee-san? Is there something in there you don’t want me to see?"

"N-no. Well, you see. It’s not that there’s anything that violates public order and morals, but…"

"Come to think of it, Paisen. Is ‘Renge’ in your room right now?"

"…"

"…I see. Erina-san, please take that side. I’ll take the right."

"Okaaay."

"Help me… Help me, Kyouta-chan-kun…!"

I quietly averted my eyes from Aira-san as she was carried away like a captured alien.

Some beings… are beyond saving.

"Noooooooh!!"

The door slammed shut, and the professor turned to face me.

"Now then, Yagawa-kun. This is rather sudden, but I have a few questions I’d like to ask you. Is that alright?"

"Y-yes."

With a gentle smile, the professor placed a cup and saucer of tea in front of me.

"Ah, thank you…"

"Not at all. Now, for my sudden and rather impertinent question… Yagawa-kun. Are you currently seeing anyone?"

"…Huh?"

I couldn't help but ask back bluntly. Across from me, the professor just sat there, smiling pleasantly.

"An old woman like me is starved for tales of young love. It’s not exactly payment for the lesson, but would you be willing to tell me?"

"Well… I’m not seeing anyone, ‘right now,’ but…?"

I somehow managed to answer, suppressing the urge to fidget.

I’d phrased it as if I had in the past, but the truth was, my age and my years without a girlfriend were one and the same. Still, I think everyone wants to put on a brave face sometimes.

Like, for instance, when your friend’s grandmother asks about your love life.

"Oh, my. You’re so reliable, Yagawa-kun, I was certain you already had a girlfriend."

"No, not at all… someone like me."

"Don’t say ‘someone like you.’ The women around you simply had poor taste, I suppose."

Professor Arisugawa chuckled. I managed a weak smile and took a sip of tea to hide my awkwardness.

Oh, this tea is good. I don’t usually drink it straight, but I could get used to this.

"Then, is there anyone you’re interested in now?"

I was a little surprised to see her ask with such sparkling eyes. So this was another side of her.

But, someone I’m interested in, huh…

It may sound incredibly insincere, but I'm surrounded by so many attractive girls that the thought of 'who' doesn't even come to mind. If anything, I’d like to date all of them. Not that I could.

"Not really…"

"Is that so? But you are interested in the opposite sex, aren’t you? You are at that age, after all."

"P-please don’t tease me…!"

The professor narrowed her eyes, smiling like a young girl who’d just thought of a prank. She looked a little like Aira-san in that moment, though her expression lacked the same undercurrent of malice.

"My apologies. But, let’s see… Romance is not something to be rushed."

As she said that, her smile turned just a little sad.

…Aira-san’s mother had an affair with her high school sweetheart, didn't she?

Come to think of it, for the Arisugawa family, wasn't talk of romance basically a minefield?

"You have all sorts of people around you. It might be a good idea not to be swayed by fleeting emotions and to cherish the relationships you have now. Rather than wandering in search of new encounters, it can be good to settle down and take your time."

"Y-yes. I’ll take that to heart…"

"However…"

Her expression turned back to that of a mischievous child.

"On a personal note, I would be happy if the person you fall in love with in the future happens to be one of my granddaughters."

"…Huh?!"

As I nearly spilled my tea in surprise, the professor continued with a perfectly straight face.

"There, Yagawa-kun. Your posture is slipping. As I just taught you, your back should be perfectly straight."

"Ah, s-sorry."

"…I’m joking. Were you surprised?"

The professor stuck her tongue out playfully, and my shoulders slumped.

…That was a joke, right? Both parts?

Aware that my face was turning red, I downed the rest of my tea. A moment ago it had tasted delicious, but now I was in no state to enjoy it.

With a somewhat satisfied smile, the professor turned her gaze toward the door behind me.

"Well now. It wouldn’t do for an old woman to take up too much of a young man’s time with idle chatter. Let’s call it a day here."

"Ah, yes. Thank you for everything."

"Not at all. Next time, let’s try studying English. Erina has trouble with pronunciation, so she can join us."

"Yes, ma’am…"

"Oh, and please show your face to Aira and the others before you leave. Their room is the corner one on the second floor. Well then, until next time."

"Understood. I look forward to it."

I stood and bowed to the professor, who gave an elegant nod in return.

Then, I headed up the stairs to Aira-san’s room. The house was large, but each door was labeled with stylish lettering, so there was no chance of getting lost.

As I approached the door labeled ‘Isla,’ I started to hear a clamor of voices. Were they playing some kind of game?

I thought it might be rude to interrupt, but the professor did tell me to show my face.

"Excuse me, I was about to head home."

I gave a light knock and called out. The door opened immediately from the inside.

"Kyou-chan, you’re leaving already?!"

It was Erina-san. Her blonde hair swayed as she brought her face close to mine.

"Yeah, pretty much."

I averted my gaze, my heart pounding at the faint, sweet scent that wafted from her.

"Aww. I was hoping you’d have a sleepover with Senpai."

"Erina-san? When did I agree to stay over…?"

Behind her, Miyoshi-san was smiling wryly.

"You can’t?"

"…Well, I don’t think there was anything in the fridge I needed to take care of right away, and I was planning on going shopping on the way home, but…"

"Yay! Then it’s settled! I think we have a guest toothbrush somewhere!"

With that, Erina-san turned back to me.

Her eyes were sparkling like a puppy begging for attention.

"No, I can’t."

"Ehh?"

"I’d probably die."

"Die?!"

It’s not that surprising.

I am a high school boy with somewhat low social skills. This is a girls-only space. And they’re all gorgeous. Therefore, death.

It’s a simple calculation even a child could understand.

"Fine. I’ll let you go this time."

"From what high horse are you speaking…?"

"However! Don’t think you can escape next time! I will most certainly make you mine!!"

"Is that your evil organization monologue?"

"Non! It’s my ninja monologue!"

"Whatever."

Still, the master of the room was being awfully quiet. I’d imagine she’d normally be crawling her way into the conversation by now.

As I tilted my head in confusion, I heard a voice.

"Oh, Yagawa-kun. Could you come here for a moment?"

"Yes?"

For some reason, Miyoshi-san was beckoning me into the room with a huge smile on her face.

Was it okay for me to go in? Hesitantly, I took a slow step forward.

"While we’re at it, let’s have you look at Nee-san too. It’s not fair if I’m the only one you saw."

"Huh?"

"Wha?"

In the back of the room, which looked to be at least twenty tatami mats in size, was Aira-san.

Dressed in bloomers.

A white, short-sleeved gym shirt and navy-blue bloomers. The kind of bloomers you’d only see in an adult shop these days.

Her massive breasts, framed by her slender arms, were partially concealed by her right arm, while her left hand desperately pulled at the hem of her shirt to hide her lower body.

But the shirt was too short, only succeeding in creating a magnificent ‘shirt tent.’ The navy-blue triangle and her exposed white thighs were perfectly visible. For some reason, her butt and thighs seemed even more voluptuous than Mia-san’s, though she didn’t look overweight at all.

She was even wearing thick white socks and school slippers, a combination that, along with her long silver hair tied up in a ponytail, somehow amplified the ‘shady adult shop’ vibe.

Looking at her now, Aira-san had refined, mature features, and the room was plastered with anime posters and other things, so…

"Ky-Kyouta-chan-kun?! What is the meaning of this, barging into a maiden’s room!"

"S-sorry!"

I quickly tried to turn around, but Miyoshi-san grabbed my shoulder and stopped me.

"Fufufu. Nee-san. Do you now understand the cruelty of what you did to me?"

"I get it! I get it, so at least give me back my bra!"

Aira-san said, turning her back to us. Her bloomers were riding up, revealing a tiny sliver of light blue fabric.

…Wait, she’s not wearing a bra right now?!

"Ah… you’re so cute, Nee-san…"

And isn’t the person next to me making a really weird face? Am I being dragged into some strange sisterly roleplay?

For now, I took one step to the side to break free and turned the other way.

And came face-to-face with Erina-san.

"What’s wrong, Kyou-chan? Does your stomach hurt again?"

"…No, not really."

Erina-san started rubbing my hunched back.

Please stop. If you’re kind to me now, the guilt is going to kill me…!

"Want me to teleport you home? I marked your house last time."

"…I’m good. I’ll walk. Thank you for today. Really."

"O-okay? Be careful, then."

"Yep. Thanks for having me."

"Now, Nee-san. Next is this cat-ear headband…"

"As the one who prepared it, I must ask, don’t elf ears and cat ears clash attribute-wise?! Ah, Kyouta-chan-kun?! Help me! Kyouta-chan-kuuuun!!"

I left the Arisugawa residence and headed straight home.

Along the way, I thought relentlessly of all the powerful enemies I had fought so far.

The Orc Champion, who belied his barbaric appearance with skillful spear work that had me on the ropes.

Lefkos, who fought with the ferocity of a flame, charging with no regard for his own safety and giving the three of us a tough fight.

The Demon, a nightmare of overwhelming mana, who skillfully manipulated it to crush us.

I had been on the verge of death so many times. The fear and pain I felt then were things I would never forget.

My mind, shifted into combat mode, suppressed all physiological reactions. I returned home quietly, putting off even washing my hands and gargling, and went straight to my room.

I dived onto my bed and buried my face in my pillow.

"UNBELIEVABLLLLLLLE………!!"

It was a cry from the soul.

Memories of battles with powerful enemies? What are those, are they tasty?

In this world, could there be a memory more precious than a ‘lewd, blonde, busty elf in a nun’s outfit’ or a ‘bra-less, silver-ponytail, busty half-elf in bloomers’? No, there could not.

Incidentally, about half of what I learned in the etiquette lesson had completely slipped from my mind. I was terrified of the next class.