168 - Reconciliation and Mirshe's Strange Change
"......Can you tell me what Tina likes?"
"What is it? Out of nowhere?"
I look up at Leonardo behind me, thinking, he has never asked about my preferences before. I feel like maybe at the very beginning he asked about general preferences, but no matter what I chose, he would say it was too plain, or that there were better things, and in the end Leonardo decided everything. My preferences were almost never reflected. Thinking it would be useless no matter what I answered, when I answered freely and openly, Leonardo furrowed his brow as if troubled.
"......Up until now I have been forcing my preferences on you, Tina, and I am reflecting on that. So I want to hear what you like, anew."
He asks me again if there is anything I want to demand of him, and I think a little. It seems he is trying to improve, in his own way.
......But I cannot tell how serious he really is.
I want to be careful not to expect too much, since it would be sad to be betrayed again. Simple-minded me is liable to accept Leonardo right away, so consciously keeping my distance is important for self-defense.
"I want to cut my hair."
It has gotten quite long, I say, playing with my hair which I have not tied up today since I was a bed-ridden resident until just now. When Leonardo first took me in, it was a little longer than shoulder-length, but now it reaches my back. It is a good length for Kalisa to braid, but it is summer now. I want it a little shorter.
"Long hair is cute too...... no, that will not do. This is me forcing my preferences, is it not."
After showing signs of that reflection, Leonardo said I could consult with Kalisa and cut it to whatever length I like. From his expression, I can see his struggle. He wants to say long hair is cuter, more girlish, and tries not to oppose cutting it. But deep down, he probably does not want me to cut it. He starts playing with my hair, reluctant to let go.
"I also want less frills and ribbons and ruffles on my clothes."
I think they are cute, but they do not seem practical. With my appearance in this life, I really do look cute like a doll, but I feel like that makes Leonardo lose sight of me being a living human even more. When I was wearing the shabby clothes from Mey Village or the secondhand clothes prepared in Waiyakku Valley, I feel like Leonardo tried to confirm my will more.
"I would like simpler clothes."
"Then, next time we have your clothes made, let us discuss it."
The orders for autumn clothes are already finished, so my preferences will be reflected starting from winter clothes, I suppose. For winter clothes in my case, after being taken by spirits, they will be based on the premise of an animal costume, so it might not change much from now.
"Also, please stop bringing back only sweets as souvenirs. I will turn into a pig."
"Then, dolls or stuffed toys... toys?"
"I do not need anything."
I understand he is reflecting and trying to change, but Leonardo fundamentally does not understand anything. I do not think giving things is the only way to show love. And what I want is not things.
"Tina never wants anything. What should I give you, Tina? What would make you happy if I gave it to you?"
"I do not need THINGS. If you are giving, I want FAMILY."
This time, Leonardo fell silent. Maybe he understood that what I am seeking is what he himself lacks the most. This is also a huge jab.
"......What Tina wants is what I lack the most."
Leonardo murmurs quietly, and I start to feel like maybe I was a little too harsh, but then I reconsider. If I give in to being charmed right away, nothing will change from before. I have to hammer it into Leonardo's head that he must be stricter and think more about his little sister. If I am the only one compromising, I will never become family with Leonardo.
"This time, I will properly become Tina's family, so let me start over again."
"If you mess up next time, I will run away from home to Alf-san's place for real, you know."
I threaten him thoroughly, saying then I will become Aurelia's child instead, and he hugs me from behind as if to say he will not let me go anywhere. It is a little stifling.
"This time, I will do my best not to be abandoned by my little sister Tina."
Having made a tentative reconciliation with Leonardo, a week after my fever went down, finally getting permission to go out from my guardian, I headed to the Menhishumi Church for the first time in ten days. Leonardo was supposed to come pick me up today. Since I attend morning classes in the summer, I have plenty of time after class ends. Leonardo apparently wants to use that time to apologize to Teo.
"......Huh? That is rare, Lusio is here."
The person assigned to look after me at the Menhishumi Church is Nils. Back when Teo was running wild as a brat, Lusio was with us as a brute-force guard, but recently Teo has not been acting up. So Lusio seems to have returned to his original work, and only shows up when we invite him to things like festival visits. That Lusio was standing right inside the main gate, even though we had not made any plans.
"Hello, Tina-sama. Has your fever gone down?"
Nils smiles gently, just like always. I return his greeting and apologize for going home alone during river play. At that time, I was so angry at Leonardo that I genuinely lost all sense of before and after.
"So, what is going on with Lusio?"
It is rare for him to be out to meet me, I say as I greet him and prompt for an answer. Nils and Lusio both make troubled faces.
......What is it? Did something happen?
I look between their faces, wondering which one to ask for an answer, when Lusio speaks up before I can say anything.
"Ah, young lady. It is about Teo..."
"Teo? Leonardo-san told me I have to apologize to Teo, but..."
Of course, with the premise that Teo apologizes first. I have the awareness that I said too much, so I do plan to apologize properly myself.
Is he already in the classroom? I ask, and Lusio's face tenses up.
"Teo has not come yet?"
"......Teo's name is a taboo word for a while."
Can you do that? Lusio presses me, and though I find it strange, I agree. This is the first time Lusio has asked me for something like this. Which means it must be something quite serious.
......Huh? Mirshe-chan is here, though?
When I enter the classroom, I see Mirshe's small back at her usual seat. The fact that Teo is not beside her is a very odd sight.
Finding it strange but feeling that Nils and the others want me to act the same as usual, I greet Mirshe, pretending nonchalance. As I sit next to Mirshe, feeling an atmosphere that is more than a little uncomfortable, she looks up vaguely and our eyes meet.
......Huh? Something about Mirshe-chan's face feels off?
More than Teo not being beside her, I feel something off about Mirshe's face. Even just Mirshe, who usually laughs cheerfully and cutely, looking dejected and withdrawn would be strange enough, but what I am feeling now should not be that.
"What is this?! Mirshe-chan, your cheek is swollen!"
It is a very subtle difference, but the puffiness of her cheeks is different between right and left. Her left cheek feels like it is swollen unevenly, and when I touch it, it is slightly warm too.
"Who hit you? Do not tell me it was Teo...?!"
Oops, I think, but it is already too late. Even though Lusio had just warned me, I accidentally said the taboo word 'Teo'. What happens when you say a taboo word, I learn immediately. Before I can even retract my slip, Mirshe's black eyes tremble with tears, and by the time large teardrops start streaming down her cheeks, she is sobbing out loud. Seeing Mirshe in such a little-girl hysterical state for the first time, I am truly pathetic, but I get flustered and do not know what to do. I want to comfort her, make her stop crying, but a calm part of me in the corner of my mind makes the very rational decision to take her outside since it will disturb the class. Despite Mirshe being in this state, I felt like a terribly cold-hearted person.
Getting Nils to accompany me, I take Mirshe out of the classroom, and the black dog Oscar approaches me as I come out of the building. Since a child crying inside the building would disturb the other students, I move to a shaded spot on the grounds. Outside, the sound will disperse, so it should not bother the other students as much.
......Uuugh, Lusio's gaze is piercing.
Joining us who came out of the classroom was not just the black dog. Lusio had also moved to the shade, wherever he had been waiting.
......Well, he did warn me beforehand that 'Teo' was a taboo word, so it is my fault for slipping up.
Wanting her to calm down first, I take out a candy from my bag. I pop it into Mirshe's mouth, and after a little while, her crying quiets down. Waiting a bit longer, Mirshe regains her composure, though she occasionally hiccups.
"Can I ask what happened?"
Since they said it was a taboo word, maybe I should not ask. But I have already stepped on the landmine. I do not want to make any more mistakes, so first I want to know what happened.
"Big bro...... Teo, big brother, got... sold."
"Huh?"
The word 'sold' makes my mind go blank for a moment. I have heard stories about people being bought and sold, but everything I had heard before was all stories from the past. The Daltowa couple's child being sold was over twenty years ago, and Alisa and Tabitha selling themselves to work as servants at the residence was also years ago. I never imagined that a close friend would be bought and sold so recently.
"Daddy...... borrowed a lot of money, had to pay it back, no money..."
The hiccups keep interrupting her midsentence, but Mirshe tells me what happened to Teo. It is from around the time I was bedridden with a high fever. Her father came home after a long time, but apparently he was in deep debt. To raise money to pay off that debt, her mother called a slave trader. The mother initially tried to sell Mirshe, but the father decided to sell Teo. The reason was that Mirshe could be 'made to earn' in a few more years, but Teo would eat even more than he already does in a few more years, and yet he is a freeloader with no prospect of earning anything decent. Mirshe and Teo apparently have different fathers, so it was not because Mirshe's biological father made that choice. As for Mirshe's cheek being swollen, it seems that in the end, Teo chose to be sold himself. Teo was bought in a form where he protected his little sister from the mother who insisted on selling Mirshe. The slave trader also wanted Teo, who was bigger for a child, rather than a girl who would need several more years to 'earn', so the interests of everyone except the mother aligned.
......Yeah, this is definitely a taboo word.
Having heard the story, I regret that I should not have asked. No, that is wrong. I needed to hear it. I needed to hear it, but Mirshe should not have had to tell it.
......You should have told me first, you idiot Lusio!
It is completely just me taking my frustration out on him, but I curse at Lusio in my heart. If I had heard this first, I never would have carelessly brought up Teo's name.
......I cannot apologize anymore, Leonardo-san.
Teo, who was sold to a slave trader a few days ago, is nowhere to be found now. There are regrets about not being able to apologize. Leonardo taught me that just the other day, but I never imagined it would happen to me so soon.
I do not know how long I comforted Mirshe in the shade. Suddenly the black dog barks once, and I reflexively look up. Turning my gaze, I see Leonardo entering the grounds of the Menhishumi Church from the main gate.
"Tina? What is wrong, class should still be going on."
Saying this as he approaches, Leonardo quickly grasps from the faces gathered here that 'something happened'. I am overcome with the urge to cling to him and cry, but I hold back. Mirshe has finally calmed down. I do not want to start crying myself and make Mirshe, who has just settled, cry again.
I succeed in holding back my tears by pressing my lips tightly together, but with the appearance of an adult, Leonardo, Mirshe's tear ducts loosen again. Letting out a wail, Mirshe starts telling Leonardo the same story she told me. If speaking it out loud eases Mirshe's heart even a little, that is good, but I worry that remembering Teo every time she speaks might be painful for her.
"Leo, can something be done about sold children?"
"Unfortunately, the sale of children by their legal guardians is permitted. It is not an illegal act, so there is nothing I can do about it."
If the slave trader who bought Teo came to sell him to me, I could buy him, but that would just change who owns Teo, Leonardo says. Even if he bought Teo and returned him to his parents, the parents would likely just get a taste for it and repeat the same thing.
"......Can I never see him again?"
I used to fight with Teo sometimes, but I never thought I would never see him again like this.
"I should not have said 'drop dead'..."
Teo is not dead yet, though. But if I can never see him again, it is not much different from being dead.
"Like you said, Leo, I should have apologized properly back then..."
I had thought I would never apologize until Teo apologized first. But now I desperately want to apologize to Teo. I am sorry I said such awful things, I want to say. That I went too far.
I wanted to look Teo in the face and apologize properly.
I want to check the settings and plot around the Recollection Festival once, so the next update will take two days off and is scheduled for the 27th.
Typos and missing characters will be another day. I have fixed the typos and missing characters I found.