13 - Chapter 9: The Three Idiots' Designated Request and the Serious Breakers
The party name is... the Serious Breakers!
Anyone who knows the original reference is probably a member of the Internet Elders' Association.
While they couldn't decide on adding more members, days continued to pass. One evening, after the Three Idiots had finished their usual goblin extermination request and visited the Adventurer's Guild to report the results,
the receptionist, Carla, approached them with a proposal.
"An investigation, is it?"
"Yes. It is a designated request that also serves as a Bronze Rank examination."
At the mention of a rank examination, the three looked at each other.
Currently, the Three Idiots are Iron Rank. This is the lowest rank for adventurers. Above this, the ranks ascend to Bronze, Copper, Silver, Silver-White, Gold, and Platinum. As the rank increases, the restrictions on the types of requests they can accept are relaxed, and the rewards are increased, so ranking up is not a bad thing.
However, Later, feeling that the offer was abrupt, tilted his head.
"For an exam, huh. Are we ranking up already?"
"No matter how you look at it, your track record isn't that of an Iron Rank."
After all, it had only been a little over two weeks since they registered as adventurers.
They were complete novices, in fact, they should still be doing cheap, disliked jobs like gathering requests or cleaning the city sewers. That said, they grew bored of gathering requests in the first week, and as for the sewer cleaning, the Romanette Trading Company, Marianne's family home, had been commissioned by the state to install new water and sewage systems a few years ago—a proposal actually made by Marianne herself—so they were flatly told, "We cannot let the young lady do such a thing." Or rather, the Romanette Trading Company lodged a fierce protest with the Adventurer's Guild. Behind the scenes, of course.
Regarding this, the Adventurer's Guild had also suspected as much from their family names, and the backgrounds of the Three Idiots were re-investigated. In Geoglyph's case, although he was the third son of a Margrave, he was a biological child. While status does not matter for adventurers, no one can say that the influence of such a background is non-existent. The only one who could be treated casually was Later, a commoner, but it was later discovered that he was a disciple of the Gold Rank adventurer "Gado," whose achievements are said to be no different from those of a Platinum Rank.
Realizing at this point that every single one of them had a dangerous background, the Adventurer's Guild began using Carla to guide their work toward extermination requests. This was to let them build a track record and rank up quickly.
Setting Later aside, Geoglyph and Marianne had families that were... well, their families. The guild judged that they would either gain a certain amount of achievement as adventurers or quit once they got bored. Even if they continued, they would likely go back if their families called them, so it was thought that their lives as adventurers would not be very long. Even if not, once the range of requests expanded, they would likely go on journeys instead of staying in the Imperial Capital. That would be easier on the stomach of the Imperial Capital's branch guild.
"Well, it's true that I'm getting a bit bored, so I appreciate it."
"Hahaha... bored, is it..."
However, this is where the Adventurer's Guild's naive outlook was revealed.
For some reason, these three were super competent. Normally, adventurers in the Iron Rank era are all novices. At the time of the guild's founding, the system was relatively laissez-faire, believing that adventurers should be free to do as they pleased, but recently, the guild has been providing a certain amount of assistance.
For example, for requests involving field investigations, including gathering and extermination, support can be received free of charge from a guild-referred adventurer for the first time only. While failing the first request is fine, losing a life because of it would mean the guild loses human resources. Therefore, it was customary to impart a certain amount of know-how. A so-called tutorial mission.
Of course, the three had received that explanation, but the idiots were too hungover to care, so it had completely slipped from their memories. Carla had thought that they wouldn't last long, but in reality, the opposite phenomenon occurred.
Day after day, they annihilated goblins, orcs, and the like by the village, bringing massive amounts of extermination proof to the guild.
These people with dangerous backgrounds also possessed a corresponding level of strength. Incidentally, the Adventurer's Guild has not yet recognized that there is a significant discrepancy between the "corresponding level" as evaluated by others and the actual reality.
"Um, the request is an investigation of a pioneer village in the Feresque Great Forest, southwest of the Imperial Capital. Contact has been lost about a week ago."
"If we rush by carriage, it's a distance that takes less than three days. And what do you mean contact has been lost?"
"We send supply convoys regularly, but the convoys aren't returning. The last one was sent a week ago."
"Is it possible they were attacked by bandits?"
"Since it's the pioneering of the Great Forest, the state is involved, and adventurer escorts are a given. A unit of the Imperial Army was also serving as escorts as a form of training."
"And they haven't returned... This might be a bit too much for an Iron Rank party to handle, no?"
Carla nodded at Geoglyph's question.
"Yes, that is why your main role is not to lead, but to assist the Silver Rank party 'Hekireki.' Depending on the investigation results, you will return first with that information. Depending on the content, the Imperial Army will be deployed."
"So we are a vanguard acting as scouts. ...I wonder why the Imperial Army approved this."
"There seemed to be some conflict. But, well..."
"Internal politics of the army, then."
"What's that about?"
When Later tilted his head, Geoglyph shrugged. He said it was a common story.
"It's a struggle between the field-oriented faction, who are concerned about the safety of their comrades and believe reinforcements should be sent immediately, and the noble-oriented faction, who care about face and believe that it's impossible for the glorious Imperial Army to fail a mission, so they should wait. It's a heated debate where neither side will budge, so as a compromise, they decided to let adventurers investigate first."
"You understand it well..."
"I'm the third son of a Margrave, after all."
Even among the vassals under a noble, factions form when there are no external enemies. The Imperial Army, which has many soldiers sent from various nobles or commoners who rose through merit, must be a melting pot of factions. It is said that if there are three people, a faction will form, so let alone a large group.
"And so, I would like you to head out early tomorrow morning, but..."
"You're being vague."
"To be honest, as Geoglyph-sama said, I believe this request is too much for an Iron Rank, even as assistants. If you refuse, the exam will simply be postponed, and I have another party in mind, so please consider not accepting as an option."
"Hoh... that's an interesting judgment for a receptionist, isn't it?"
Carla, of course, knew the intentions of this Imperial Capital branch, but she believed this request was a mischoice. Moreover, having dealt with these Three Idiots for the past two weeks, her impression of them had improved significantly from the initial image of drunks.
"Young adventurers who do not make errors in judgment are precious. Especially when they have a 100 percent request completion rate, suffer not a single injury, and have trust in their background."
"Oh, we are quite trusted, aren't we?"
"It is trust based on objective facts. Therefore, I want to treasure you until you grow a bit more."
In reality, many adventurers make some kind of mistake during their Iron Rank era. The causes vary, but most of the time it's because they made a wrong judgment. Carla had predicted that these idiots, who messed up their alcohol intake right after becoming adults, would have a terrible time, but that prediction was greatly betrayed. In a good way.
She hadn't seen the strength of these three directly, but more than that, they never missed the point. Even for a single goblin extermination request, they reported in detail the assumptions they considered and the impact during the extermination. In fact, a few days after they gave a prophecy-like warning that other monsters would come after exterminating orcs, a snake-type monster called a Cutting Viper appeared. In terms of difficulty, it was something that would require one Silver Rank party or two Copper Rank parties.
Due to these circumstances, Carla placed a certain amount of trust in these Three Idiots.
"So, what are we doing? Well, knowing Sensei, you'll probably accept."
"Please make a decision, Leader?"
"Why have I become the leader?"
"Because your family background and intellect are just right. My job is to go out front and punch things, and the princess is busy controlling her subordinates."
"It is more strategic for the person who can maintain a barrage of fire from the rear while overseeing the battle situation and unleash super firepower at the right moment to be the leader."
"...You just pushed it on me with a reason that sounds plausible because it's a hassle, didn't you...?"
Geoglyph looked at them with half-closed eyes at the plausible reason, but the two of them were whistling, completely unbothered.
"...Sigh. I understand. We accept the request. Where should we gather early tomorrow morning?"
After a while, Geoglyph resigned himself and finalized the details of the request. At the end, Carla spoke to them.
"Oh, and please decide on a party name soon."
At the mention of a party name, the three were blank for a moment, then clapped their hands. They remembered they hadn't decided on one yet.
"...What should we do? Should we go for a joke, like 'Geo and his Jolly Companions'?"
"Why put my name in it?"
"Because you're the leader. If you hate that, since we're at it, shall we try something chuunibyou-like, such as 'Midnight Raven'?"
"It might feel good right after we name it, but we'll writhe in agony when we look back on it later..."
The three put their heads together and offered various opinions, but they couldn't decide.
"What should we do, I can't think of a good name. I can think of a few subculture references like Little Busters or Super Peace Busters, but..."
"I can go with as many Sentai-style things as you want, like Ninninger, but originals are hard."
"I can think of some if it's Sunday morning anime, but I wonder if Precure is okay while carrying two guys—come to think of it, recently a male Precure appeared as a main character rather than a spot, so maybe this is the right flow?"
"Stop it."
"Children who can't keep things serious..."
Carla, who didn't understand the content but sensed they were leaning toward jokes, muttered softly, and the three widened their eyes.
"That's it!"
"Eh?"
They pointed sharply at Carla. It seemed they had thought of something trivial again.
"That's lovely. 'Serious that doesn't last.' Or 'Breaking the serious'."
"Being serious isn't my hobby. If we're going to do it, let's be seriously unserious."
"A ridiculous name makes it easier to operate. We can just change it if we get tired of it."
"Um...?"
And so, the Three Idiots announced their name.
"The party name is... the Serious Breakers!"
Thus, the problem-child party was born here, which would later earn numerous nicknames such as "The Strongest Party that Makes the Empire Ashamed," "The Bonklers with Real Power," "The Unreasonable Trio of the Adventurer's Guild Imperial Branch," "The Trouble Makers," and "The Secret Weapon We Wanted to Keep Secret."
Carla, looking at the idiots announcing their name with smug faces with cold eyes, lamented in her heart, "I might have been a bit too quick to trust them..."
To be continued tomorrow.